I focus my experiencing and awareness on being
"a pioneer of Evolution in
learning to feel":
I let my Body vibrate and my Heart 'womb'
pain, shame, fear, boredom, powerlessness,
so feelings can >heal >guide>fulfill>evolve,
and ~~~ offer ~~~"goldmines"~~~ to us all!! "I
want you to feel everything, every little thing!"
From a
letter, written - probably in 1984- by Helmut Strebel, the friend
of my war-killed father,
who sometimes visited us, and who gave me, when I was 12, the feeling,
that I was a partner to talk with...
Here he expresses his fascination with my ability
to let every kindness that was shown to me
resonate in me for decades. He hopes, that this"sensibility,
that seems to me like a miracle"will
radiate into the world.
"Dass Dich die Widmung meiner Mutter in einem
Band von Bach-Orgelwerken heute nach Jahrzehnten noch staerkend begleitet,
gehoert in die Reihe tiefer, langdauerender Resonanzen, mit denen
alles, was Dir irgenwann als Gutes widerfuhr,
in Dir nach und aus Dir zurueckklingt in einer Weise,
die ich noch kaum an einem Menschen erlebt habe,
und sei es ein Kuss, den meine Schwester Dir als Kind auf die Stirn
gedrueckt hat.
Diese Sensibilitaet, die mir wie ein Wunder erscheint, droht abzusterben
und damit ein wesentlicher Teil unseres Menschseins,
und gewiss geht viel von Dir aus,
sie auch in der naechsten Generation zu erhalten oder zu entwickeln,
ohne dass Du bewusst darauf hinwirkst."
"Heaven on Earth"
or "GRATeFULLness"
".......Among the makers of humanity are those of you who are
doing this healing work~~~
manifesting your own healing into wholeness and by extension, the
healing of all Creation." From
"A Letter from God to Those Doing the Healing Work"
Oh heaven on earth!
Oh water, oh light!
Oh shade in the sun!
Oh pleasure in soil!
Oh air in the desert to breathe and to smell!
Oh stones, rocks and rivers!
Oh flowers and trees!
Oh birds, ants and camels!
Oh flies far from skin!
Oh people before me and with me, be blessed!
My ears to enjoy
and my eyes to delight!
My legs to climb up
and my back to bend down!
My brains to make sense, to create and to grow
My fingers to touch
and my arms to embrace!
My BODY, my FEELING,
my HEART full of love!
My WILL and my SPIRIT do know WE ARE ONE!
I don't know, when and how I came
across the website http://thxthxthx.com/
of Leah Dieterich,
who posts a "thank-you" on every single day.
Though I cannot understand many of her USA-related topics, I'm simply
grate-full for this site!
are going to be uplifted
GREAT-ly by"Firing the Grid"
today on 07_07_17
July 17, 2011 - after much
search I found an updated page of "Firing the Grid" in many
languages, in
English Towards a new date : 11_11_11
This is the time to tell the beginnings of my learning
GRATe-FULL-ness
December 1946_07, Stuttgart-Gaisburg,
Primary School, 3 PM
I don't remember the
date of first entering third grate in this school,
but I do remember the 6th of December 1946
My poor mother had just learnt, that my father, missed since
3 years,
had been killed during the American Invasion to Sicily August
5, 1943.
Now the French Occupation Authorities evicted all evacuated
people.
So I see us three little kids and my mother crouching above
the furniture
in the back of a truck, crossing the ridges of the Suabian
Alb, gliding on ice..
We must have reached Stuttgart in the morning of December
7th,
and as I know my mother, we were sent to school the very same
day.
This explains, why I remember myself entering my new class
at 3 PM.
I remember it because of the one thing that was "learnt"
then:
Somebody read a story from Grimm's Fairy-Tales:
"The Fisherman and his
Wife"
I was utterly shaken by the story:
A poor fisher catches an unusual fish who talks to him:
"If you let me go, I'll fulfil you a wish".
He went home to his pig-pit where he lived with his wife.
Consulting with his wife, she says: "Ask for a little
hut!"
He goes out to the sea, expresses his wish, comes home:
There - the woman lived in a little hut.
But she is not content: "Why did we only ask for a hut?
Go to the sea and ask for a villa!"
But, of course, a villa wasn't enough either.
Every time the fisher goes to the sea and asks for something
bigger,
the ocean becomes more agitated.
Finally the woman demands to become God himself!
It was then that a storm almost swallows fisher and beach,
and when he hardly saves his skin and comes "home",
he finds his wife cowering again in a pig-pit...
I attended this school for a year and a half until the start
of highschool.
So the first conscious thought about GRATe-FULL-ness
must have taken place in 1947 or 1948, when I was 9 or 10.
Our teacher, Fraeulein Schnell, told us: "Yesterday my little nephew
visited me and I made a pudding.
You should have seen, how grateful he was for this pudding!
This is important, that you learn to be grateful for small
things."
It occurs to me right now for the first time to connect another
story.
It was in a tiny book, given to me by my mother, I don't know
when.
It's again about a couple, living in the poorest of abodes.
A guest comes to the village, asking for shelter for the night.
All the rich people send him away, but he is welcomed in the
hut.
The next morning he gives the couple a ring with these words:
"If you express a wish and rub the ring, it will be fulfilled.
But mind you! The ring will do this only one single time."
So this couple, too, wish for a bigger hut.
But unlike the fisherman's wife, they say:
"It would be a pity to waste the wish
on something we can achieve by our own efforts!"
Every time, they want to realize a wish by rubbing the ring,
they say:
"This, too, we can achieve by our own efforts!
We must save the ring for something we truly can't do ourselves."
They achieve everything, and one day they share their story.
Greedy sons steal the ring, but rubbing the ring doesn't work
for them.
The couple dies, never knowing that the ring on their finger
was false.
For many, many years the story has helped me to live.
Whenever I wanted to rub the ring in order to leave this life,
I said, like the couple, "I can still give living
another try,
the ring will always be there as a last refuge."
For me the third way is the way I walk on anyway day after day:
"The third way to fire the grid is to find your joy and
bliss.
It may be any joy you can think of,
the smile on your child’s face or licking an ice cream
cone.
Simply find a human experience that brings you joy
then give thanks and gratitude for the experience.
This process of keeping your heart light and filled with joy,
is the method that I use everyday
to practice firing my own grid system
and lifting my own vibrational field.
That is the energy that lives in and around my physical body.
...
"In order to fire the earth grid
you need to find that state within your own personal being
which resonates that life is wonderful
then give thanks for that wonder.
Spend the hour doing that which brings you great pleasure,
whether that is listening to music
or lounging in bed reading to your child.
Do the thing that brings you your greatest joy.
Spend this creation hour in a happy, blissful place
then remember to say thank you to the Energy force
that allows us this earthly time and experience.
This will work to fire your own personal grid
and in turn fire your piece of the earth grid on that day.
"It is paramount to remember
that acceptance of all other ways is key.
We must learn to unite ourselves by our similarities
and not divide by that which makes us different. ..
We choose to acknowledge each individual ritual as important
and then in that moment
we are all on the same path working toward the same goal.
"It is in the doing that we create the reality in which
we live.
If you do anything on that day with the intention of making
a difference
then the activity you choose is not of such great importance.
It is the fact that you are consciously choosing to do something
that is the great sharing moment.
The key event during that hour is that you choose to do something,
anything wonderful,
find the joy of potential
and then have gratitude for the experience.
It is the gratitude that will fire the grid
..... for the direction we wish our world to move towards."
And
while trying, it helped me to apply Fraeulein Schnell's message:
to discern the millions of small things that I can be GRATe-FULL
for.
I'll close my story of learning GRATe-FULL-ness
by thanking four men who helped me with that, though I never
met them.
Albert Schweitzer,
my idol, when I was a child and young girl, explains and exemplifies
- in a book about his
childhood,
which I bought from the money I got for my confirmation at
the age of 15 - how important it is, to
not only feel grateful,
but to verbally express
my gratitude towards the people who give me a gift.
Later two writers came into my life
and are almost the only ones I keep coming back to :
Rainer Maria Rilke, the poet, the writer, the teacher, the
philosopher, the "everything",
and Heinrich Waggerl, the writer of what I would call "Miniatures
of Small Things".
As to Rilke -
I've given a tune to a poem, in which he expressively
lifts up the smallest of things:
Nichts
ist mir zu klein, und ich lieb es trotzdem
und mal' es auf Goldgrund und groß
und halte es hoch, und ich weiß nicht wem
löst es die Seele los...
An
attempt to translate: Nothing is too small
for me, and I still love it,
and paint it on gold and huge
and lift it high up, and I don't know whom
will it untie or loosen the soul
I am GRATe-FULL
for the electricity, (a 10 minute interruption woke me up at
5:50 !),
and to all the people who invented it and provide it and repair
the hardware of it!
I am GRATe-FULL
for the water, which cleaned my body after peeing and shitting,
and flooded urine and shit into the sewage
and to all the people who take care of bringing water into my
house and of disposing of the sewage
I am GRATe-FULL for my body's perfect functioning
during sleep
and to all the people who have helped me during my life to take
care of my body, to heal it, to enjoy it
I am GRATe-FULL
for my most precious one-room flat+kitchen and its spacious
veranda
and to all the people who have designed the practicality and
beauty
of this castle and to those who built it
I am GRATe-FULL
for the hundreds of pieces of equipment, big and small and tiny,
which make this castle such a delight to live in
and to all the people, who provided this equipment or let me
inherit stuff, or let me find it on the road-site or in the
desert
I am GRATe-FULL
for my clothes, almost all of them inherited from my daughter
and my daughters-in-love,
and to all the people, who invented the threads and the designs
and created the colors and patterns and shapes
I am GRATe-FULL
for my little garden and the innumerous pots on the low walls
of it and of the veranda
and to the sun and the soil - poor as it is here in the desert
- that let them grow
I am GRATe-FULL
for the allowance from the National Insurance, which provides
me with the money I need,
and to all the people, who pay for it and who channel it by
exact rules and measurements.
I am GRATe-FULL
for the computer and the Internet, which enables me to learn
and create and interact when and how I choose to,
and to all the people who invented those fantastic "things",
and maintain them!
I am GRATe-FULL
for the fast water-heater (term?) for coffee and tea,
something only a person, who
lived in a gas-powered bus or cave can appreciate,
and to the people who invented it and shipped it and keep a
shop in town to sell it.
I am GRATe-FULL
for the coffee (the tea grows in my garden)
and to the people who work so hard for so little money to grow
and harvest the coffee-beans
and to those who prepare them as instant coffee and ship it
and store it and sell it to me.
I am GRATe-FULL
For the milk in my cup of coffee in the morning,
and to the cows who are forced to produce too much milk ,
and to all the people involved in the process of bringing this
milk into my town.
I am GRATe-FULL
for the sugar, pure sugar and sugar in all kinds of sweets I'm
given as gifts
and to all the people who work so hard for so little money to
grow and harvest the sugar
and to those who are involved in the process of bringing it
to ME!
I am GRATe-FULL
for the special cup which allows me to drink through a straw
all the time while sitting at the computer without the drink
getting cold
and to the person who developed this cup and to the people who
worked for turning the raw material, iron (?) and plastic (?)
into this cup.
I am GRATe-FULL
for the path to the pool climbing down and up a little desert
Wadi, which I call "Wadi of Compassion",
and to myself who made the path, maintains it, and carries away
the garbage discarded by people and wind.
See my relation to paths in a
song .
I am GRATe-FULL
for the lily-like flowers which started to blossoms on the banks
of the road where I cross it
and to the workers of the municipality of Arad, who take care
to make the town clean and pleasant.
I am GRATe-FULL for the little town of 25000 inhabitants, not too big,
not too small, not in the centre of the country, but down here
in the desert
and to the people who - Lova
Eliav - envisioned this town in 1964 and all those who built
it and keep maintaining all its functions
I am GRATe-FULL
for the pool which is there for me twice a day, 10 minutes walk
from home, with its delightful Jacuzzi
and to the people who provide the water, the facilities, the
safety - Ilan, Valery, Dorina, Genia,
and to all the people who help me grow by forcing me to meet
them, even if I'd prefer to be alone,
the people in the inside pool, whom I judge - forgive me - as
old and fat and ugly
and the children in the outside pool, who splash and scream
and jump..,
Each of you loves his/her body enough to take it to the water,
for its health and its delight .
I
am GRATe-FULL to my legs , my thighs, my feet
and my joints,
which let me walk, even run up the twenty stairs of the pool
like when I was "young".
I am GRATe-FULL
for the special glass-jug I found on "Rakhaf"
and who serves me - in its beauty and practicality - on the
toilet,
and to Narda
and Oree who inherited it from an aunt, who died, brought
it to "Rakhaf" and let me have it
I am GRATe-FULL
for the onions, a fruit of the earth, which makes every dish
more tasty
and to the people - mostly Thais, "foreign" workers
in Israel - who plant and tend and harvest them
I am GRATe-FULL
for the little electric stove from my landlord and the big,
practical cooking pot, a gift from Eilat Troim,
and the knife - from whom? -and the chickpeas, from among the
leftovers, guarded for me by Ra'ayah until I meet with the
Quartet.
I
am GRATe-FULL to my Body's brain which invents
games, the "consumer-game", the dish-washing-game
and the "stone-game" on my path in the wadi,
and the game of creating delicious dishes from throwing together
not-too-taste ingredients that came my way.
I am GRATe-FULL
for the repair or rehabilitation
of my mouth, gums and teeth
and to the skilled and dedicated professionals in the Dental
Clinic who do their best ,
Dr. Shmuel Oron and Sarah, Dr. Irene, Dr. Ines, and the assistants,Sarah
and Anna, and secretaries , Nurit, Eti and Lee.
I am GRATe-FULL
for the letters from friends which arrived today, from Gal
Mor in Tel-Aviv and Gabriela Dietrich in South-India,
and from Gadi
Lybrock in Mitzpe-Ramon announcing the new home for his
Jazz-programs in our desert town.
I am GRATe-FULL to my body, who feels tired
- 11:45 A.M - and asks for a rest ,
but also cooperates, when I time and again jump up and leap
to the compter,
when my brain remembers another series of names to give thanks
to.
I am GRATe-FULL
to my "Time" i.e. my circumstances, which allow me
to do or to rest, whenever I want.
I am GRATe-FULL to my eyes and the fact that they are forced to constantly refocus,
since I need both, multifocal and usual glasses
and to the optometrist, Aaron Gliklis, who tries to satisfy
my worried and critical approach concerning glasses.
and to the doctor, who - discovering the beginning of a cataract
- gave hope, that the problem could stay static for a long time. [July
17, 2011: See now on my "eye-page"]
I am GRATe-FULL
for the existence of the library of a thousand years, which
is included in the Bible,
giving me inspiration ever so often during my day,
right now: while I remember and note so many names,
the fact, that the Bible has made it a point to mention thousands
and thousands of names
even many, many names of people, about whom nothing else is
known,
and all this in contrast to the Qumran-Community,
which has not even delivered the name of their "Teacher
of Righteousness",
but thank you, too, Qumran-Community! for providing me with
that teaching contrast! [July 17, 2011: My great
teacher in appreciating the experience of CONTRAST as the source
for all Desires, has become "Abraham"]
I
am GRATe-Full
for the little breaks in my mind's work, like cooking a dish
for the next 3 days,
or like brushing the carpet, sweeping the floor, dusting here
and there, and to my body, who can use so many
muscles and joints in my hands, my hips, my back, to carry out
these tasks
and to my body's brain and the "game"-skill to do
all this with amazing efficiency and swiftness and enjoyment.
I am GRATe-FULL
for the many snacks that I'm being showered with lately and
even for the one thing I bought myself -the grapes of the season!
I am GRATe-FULL
for my wonderful bed-corner, the broad mattress on the floor,
the magnetic Nikken-mattrass on top of it,
the two covers, which by their colors and size complement each
other, one from Efrat and one from Ra'ayah, my daughters-in-love,
and the Nikken-Cushion in a cover which I once found in the
desert, just like that, with dark beautiful flowers on it.
- Yes, once more for the Nikken-mattress,
blanket and cushion
and to Ya'acov
Hayat, my twin-brother - who - as a partner of Nikken -
had to prove himself for over a year,
until I believed him, that my Body would even more celebrate
its being alive, with the Nikken magnets around it.
I am GRATe-FULL
for the quietness of this neighborhood, the soothing humming
of the fridge, the vent and the computer,
but also for the voices of little Lior and Amit, when their
mother, my land-lady, leaves with them in the morning.
I am GRATe-FULL
for the wonderful weather today, not hot, not cold, with a pleasing
wind,
-and my chance to enjoy this, when going out into the garden,
when the container in the corner of the sink is full with waste-water,
ready to serve some fragile plants,
before the systematic watering towards evening,
I am GRATe-FULL
for the serenity in my soul and the wellness-feeling in my body
and the balance between dreaming along on my bed
- the one with the grey cover and sea animals above the colored
one with the donkeys and flowers in it,
and jumping up, when a new theme to thank for pops up in my
head.
It's
12:30 I am GRATe-FULL for the excitement
towards the hour 14:11,
by which time I'll connect with Shelley Jates and probably millions
of people around the Globe.
For me, my person, Heaven on Earth is already happening,
but not for others, who are like me rays of the one sun, waves
of the one ocean, colors of the one light.
On my request, Efrat just sent me the cover-photo of the local
magazine of which she is the producer:
a fat, bored boy, representing the young people who don't know
what to do with themselves and their time and therefore.....
I'm grateful for the face that this boy lent me,
so as to focus in the future on
four conditions for Heaven on Earth to exist in everybody's
life.
I am GRATe-FULL
for the tap and the sink and the towels in the bathroom
and to the people who provided all this without any money on
my part
I am GRATe-FULL
for remembering to open firingthegrid and looking for last updates
and listening to the music
and to the people who invented the technical possibilites for
me to hear this music
and to Bradfield and Anael for the music itself.
13
minutes before "Firing the Grid":
I read the last updates and felt uneasy about them:
"advertising", "petitioning"
, "partnering",
t-shirts,
all the means that I had such a hard time to give up as
unnecessary,
yes as counter-productive and wasting away the time for
the real work.
But I am GRATe-FULL to my experience and to my newly won
ability,
to not judge Shelley Yates and her helpers, but womb them
in my womb.
Even the letter, I wrote her in my mind, while in the
pool a second time,
has to be sent telepathically and not physically.
I'm GRATe-FULL that I've learnt and that I now know,
that it's not the number of people who will bring Heaven
to Earth.
Nobody knows how close we are to the "critical mass".
There might be missing just one person,
either without or within the millions who'll focus in
7 minutes.
Fire the Grid
was the event to raise our vibration
and keep us in the frequency of Love.
With Project Cause
we will now take that loving vibration
and apply it tangibly to the world
to make all our visions of the earth come true
I call
it "petitioning"
- bowing to the people of money, prestige and power - to get
them to help save the planet:
From the Letter to Opra Winfrey, inserted only on Shelley's
site, since the expensive way to get her attention, failed.
Isn't that teaching you to return to the beginnings of your
path, where you learnt to involve no money at all?
I am GRATe-FULL
for having understood again - now in the pool -
that it is not important how much I manage to do in driving
backward to heal and harvest my past.
It's not important, how many situations and names of people
I'll insert in today's GRATeFULLness list.
The world and my own experience is full of material for learning
and creating,
After having healed the major experiences---it is simply material
now ), and I'm GRATe-FULL that I'll never ever run out of material
for creating.
Later
I'll tell about the bathing-suits and about what is NOT in my
life,
people and things, the flies, the bicycle, actions and interactions.
But Now - while eating my delicious fresh dish, I
want to focus on my four wishes for humanity and the planet.
At tthe beginning of "Firing
the grid",
the sun was setting in Hongkong.
After about 20 minutes I couldn't help looking again,
this time four webcams were showing four places on earth.
Thanks to the authors of "Eternal
Sunset"
Imagining myself in all these places,
I focused my 4 wishes for humankind on the people there.
So I thought it a good idea to follow the screensaver
show
of "WEBSHOT"
- thank you people for your gift !! -
every 20 sec' another beautiful spot on earth,
for that is the criterion for choosing WEbshot's ongoing
offer - places on earth that "uplift me",
to talk with Shelley Yates:
"do what brings you joy, do what uplifts your heart".
Sunset in China
and India (above), on the Seychelles and in Kenia (below)
18:58
Almost four hours have passed in which I did not feel like noting
all the feelings of being GRATe-FULL "for" and "to"
.
I slept a little and enjoyed this
- thank you , my Body,
thank you, my freedom from obligations.
I studied the lyrics of that Haendel-Messias-Aria "Rejoice
greatly", which I've inserted in "Conditions
for Heaven-on-Earth",
after Martin Kasper, the husband of my late sister Ursel, sent
them to me yesterday : Zechariah
9:9+10b,
and was deeply touched by two words: tzaddiq nosha', which put
a totally new light on that worn-out Jesus-prophecy,
as well as by the harsh, but wise editing of these 2 verses
of Jensen,who wrote the libretto for Haendel's Messiah.
Thank you Haendel, thank you Jensen, thank you Zechariah, and
thank you, Martin Buber, who translated and taught,
that the root y-sh-a' of those misleading words - saving, salvation,
Savior - means "to free" and "to be freed",
and that the root of tz-d-q is not "justice", but
"truth"
and that "tzaddiq" is not "righteous" ,
but "bewaehrt", i.e. "someone who has lived his
truth and walked his path".
Oh yes, I am so immensely GRATe-FULL
for knowing all these languages, especially Hebrew and German,
but also English and Arabic and French, and even old Greek and
Latin, the basis for most terms of modern concepts,
and even the languages I forgot, Swedish, Russian and Spanish
have given me songs!
because each language is petrofied philosophy
and without having to study philosophy (which I hate), a word may give me a concept to understand
a world...
I am GRATe-FULL to my Mother, who - with concern to mental education
- wanted the best for me.
I am GRATe-FULL to my teachers, who taught me, and to those
who wrote the books which helped me,
and I am GRATe-FULL to myself for enduring the hardship of what
I felt as "imposed" studying for 25 years.
After the first few lessons of Hebrew I see myself sitting outside
the main Aula of the Tuebingen University and cry: "I'll
never learn this".
And I'll not talk about learning Arabic, which was sheer suffering,
until I gave up a year ago, after 40 years of intense, but failing
learning.
Still - the suffering was rewarded with the expansion of my
mind by the wealth of concepts in Arabic grammar and vocabulary,
Another
temptation I gave in to, was to re-read the
"Letter from God to those doing the Healing Work".
I did not come far, though, because I hit at a sentence, which
I hint at in the first link on top of every page, ".......Among the makers of humanity
are those of you who are doing this healing work~~~
manifesting your own healing into wholeness and by extension,
the healing of all Creation."
The quote is like part of my innermost
thinking, but I had forgotten, that I had found it in that file.
Thank you for letting me come across it there and today.
But now I needed to check to
where the link on top of the page leads and to assure myself,
that I had inserted this quote there.
I hadn't! So, "of course", I needed to correct this
right then and there, which was "out of focus" of
firing the grid!.
But looking at that page, I felt GRATe-FULL-ness for its creation
and the life-situation described and photographed in it,
and Yes - I'm so very GRATe-FULL for having this vast field
of expressing my creativity, of learning and also of healing.
Which also means, again and again, that I am so very GRATe-FULL
to my son Immanuel, who taught me everything,
yes who - in June 2001 - pushed me to engage in a website of
my own and in refusing to doing it himself. "I'd rather spend much more
time in teaching you than I would spend if I did it myself,
for there is no end to wanting to improve and expand and deepen
your creations, once you start with a website."
Then, while I was watering the garden
- expressing my gratitude to some of the happy plants and my
compassion to the less happy ones- Tzippi,
my young friend, came with her dog.
Her grandmother had died, that's why she was in Arad instead
at work in Ein-Gedi.
Is there something to be GRATe-FULL for as usually when Tzippi
visits me?
She was depressed , feeling lonelier and lonelier, yearning
for the friend, she had chosen to separate from,
but the dog needed attention ever so often, and I couldn't create
the situation of feeling inside of her and finding comfort for
her.
At least, I expressed this, and maybe this is what she needed,
to feel frustrated even by me.
But why is it that in the only interaction during the last 3
days , I find nothing to thank for?
I accompanied her to her house - in the same street - and slowly
walked back,
breathing in the harmony of the vegetation, the trees and bushes,
the houses, the sky,
yes, I was GRATe-FULL for the street I live in and for my eyes
and heart to see and to enjoy.
I am glad, I could finally sit
down and become aware of what I experienced in those almost
four hours
and in the hour of "Firing the Grid" itself.
Not everything was "uplifting", but the fact, that
I can feel and accept, what is not, is inself "uplifting".
Now the day is almost over,
but I want to go back to the second pool+walk
experience, for there was much to feel GRATe-FULL for:
First I became aware of my two
bathing-suits, the one I wore in the morning and the one I wore
at noon:
I'm GRATe-FULL
to Ronnit my daughter, who, -in early 2003 - when seeing me
almost naked in a bathing-suit totally worn out by the chlorine,
bought an Olympic suit, which now has endured at least 450 times
half an hour chlorine and is still fine.
The other one, though old and fading away, - bequeathed by Ra'ayah
- is precious to me,
but it was this gift, which made me realize in August last year,
that I could now afford the annual pool subscription (right
term?).
A tiny gift and a huge blessing!!!
But what was new , truly new
in my reflecting on what I am GRATe-FULL for,
are all the people and all the things, that
are no longer in my life!
It started with a fly and a
bicycle.
When a fly was annoying me on my way up from the wadi and I
automatically wanted to smash it,
a thought of GRATe-FULL-ness stopped me: there are almost no
flies nor mosquitos in my life today.
Today! When I started my married life in Israel in the village
Ramat-Hadar, I used to say : "the only thing which could drive
me back to Germany, are the flies here", despite
chemicals, window-grids etc.
And in
my bus I often had killed 25 flies already before breakfast,
though I had carefully sown curtains in front of doors and windows.
Thank you , municipality of Arad, for keeping flies and mosquitos
away, and thank you , flies and mosquitos, for leaving me alone!
Outside the pool I saw a lonely,
red bicycle park and remembered,
how, when I started to go to the
pool on August 26, 2006, Tzippi suggested, that I take her
bike every time.
It was only natural that I would use it, having been a bike-rider
whenever I didn't have a car at my disposal.
For about 45 years ever so many bikes were stolen, and I always
found the money to buy a new one.
But now - after some days - I found several things too cumbersome,
especially the locking and un-locking.
I decided that walking wouldn't take much longer,
and that it allowed me to see my desert every day four times,
even if only for 3 minutes walking to and fro..
Now I am GRATe-FULL for not needing a bicycle and the hardships
that go with it,
leave alone a car, which causes so many troubles and worries,
both in driving in heavy traffic and in repairs and payments,
that this alone - not needing a car for myself - is an ongoing
celebration of GRATe-FULL-ness.
I met some cats today, as usual,
and some dogs, - we had both for many years,
[see now, on July 19, 2011 at the end of K.is.s.-log
2008_01_13]
how GRATe-FULL am I, that I am free of taking care of animals
and of coping with the problems that go with them.
And from animals and
driving devices to the gigantic things that have left me:
ACTIONS AND INTERACTIONS!
On my fortieth birthday I hammered out a slogan: "I do not exist to solve problems,
rather problems exist to give me reasons for action
and pretexts for interaction."
Sometimes the slogan helped, but most of the time it didn't,
and the more actions and interaction burdened my life,
the less I was pleased even with the actions and interactions
themselves,
leave alone with the constant pressure to solve problems.
All this is gone now.
And whenever I feel pressured "to do" something,
like yesterday, when my old missionary obsession wanted to take
over
telling me, that I should send my link to my "Heaven-on-Earth"
page to every person in my present life,
some "divine" intervention - a technical problem -
prevented me from falling into that old trap:
I just couldn't make those nine pages appear on the Internet.
I knew what it meant: "You
are to stay hidden and not burden people with your personality.
That's why Shelley Yates was chosen for "Firing the Grid
" and not you."
I felt relief, and today - after "Firing the Grid "
- certain and whole,
I suddenly discovered the tiny mistake which had prevented the
pages from appearing.
Oh there
would be so much to say about this incredible liberation from
action and interaction.
IN this case, I want to direct my overwhelming GRATe-FULL-ness
directly to "God"!
It's 21:13 now
and I want to complete another great thank-you,
this time to Television in general and to the European channel
3 SAT in particular.
It was only after a digital converter was established in spring
2006, for a miraculously low monthly price,
that I could see this channel, which calls itself "To watch
TV differently".
Lately I was too fascinated with my creation on Healing-K.i.s.s.
to be patient even with 3 SAT.
But today - it's now 22:48 - I'm GRATe-FULL for the excellence
of two short documentaries and a fiction-movie.
The second doc was about new trends in burials, - a strange
subject for me who does not live to die.
But it was good to see - by contrast - that I have no longer
a problem with not dying, as I had most of my life.
Yes, I want to say it right out loud - though still with some
trembling - I am GRATe-FULL that I am alive .
We are
on the brink of a new mind set,
a world energy movement that will propel us into a bright
and boundless future. Now is the time when we will consciously
choose the direction we wish to take as we move into this
monumental event and close the first chapter of Fire the Grid.
I say the first chapter as I have new information which has
been coming since March 2007, a second project...
Chicago Tribune letter to Oprah Winfrey
Two years
ago I received guidance to contact Oprah Winfrey, a well known
talk show host in the United States of America.
I was told that Ms. Winfrey was the single most influential
person amongst the fence sitters, and was also told how to
reach her. The instructions were simple: take out a full page
ad in the Chicago Tribune...
NEW LIGHT & LOVE - A Gift from the Stars
Some time
ago in meditation I was blessed with an amazing message from
beyond. These magnificent Beings have shared with me a method
of raising your personal vibrational field that is wonderfully
easy, just by listening to an album of music. I was instructed
by these Beings to compile a selection of Bradfield music;
which had held information for me at other times...
Four Ways
to Fire our
Earth Grid
I have
been travelling and speaking for about two weeks now and I
have just realized that I have not shared a valuable piece
of information with all those that wish to fire the grid with
us. That information contains the ways in which we can actually
fire the grid. In the beginning I was only told of the two
ways to fire the earth grid. They were to meditate or pray.
I have additional information to share with the world about
how we all can all participate...
An open letter
from Shelley
I am looking
for ambassadors for the grid project, individuals who wish
to be involved in a more personal way. I am calling it the
Grid Connection Team. I am looking for team leaders in every
corner of the planet who wish to represent the project in
their area of the earth and hopefully through their efforts
we will have strong energy connections throughout this earth
when the time comes to fire the earth grid....
This second
phase of Fire the Grid is called Project Cause. The details
are still assembling. The same way I received the information
about Fire the Grid I am receiving the instructions of how
to make the second part of this incredible event realistic
and achievable.
We have
been working on the Fire the Grid Project for over two years
now and we have done all we have done for free. We have millions
of people in over 90 countries participating in our world
meditation to lift our personal vibrational fields and assist
our earth, our home to enter a state of healing. This was
and is truly a project of Love. The vision to see the world
come together in love for one hour is about to happen. This
is wondrous in itself. The mere fact that millions of people
will unite for that one hour has made Fire the Grid astounding
and that is before we even perform our intent. Imagine what
we can do when many more millions of us come together to make
the second part of Fire the Grid our truth. If three people
and no budget can make this incredible world event happen,
I see Project Cause raising the bar even higher. We will become
NEW WORLD PARTICIPANTS as we boldly declare that we desire
a new and better world in which to live and raise our children.
I want
to take this opportunity to announce to everyone that there
is indeed more to come. I am working diligently to make Project
Cause a reality and share the exciting news with everyone.
I do need some time however to make this new project take
form so I can present it in a manner that shows us all how
possible it is to create that which we so desire. We desire
a world of abundance for all, sharing and caring for each
other and all our world resources, a world full of peace and
prosperity for every living being on the planet. Fire the
Grid was the event to raise our vibration and keep us in the
frequency of Love. With Project Cause we will now take that
loving vibration and apply it tangibly to the world to make
all our visions of the earth come true..
I invite you to check
back at this site towards the end of the summer so you can
discover what Project Cause is all about and how you and your
family can get involved. There are many diverse and exciting
ideas we will be able to apply to make our world evolve into
what it was meant to be. I am excited knowing that there is
still more to come and I look forward to sharing all I have.
I would also like to
share my personal joy at seeing so many wonderful people sharing
their love with the world. When I started Fire the Grid I
remember saying “I just don’t see how this will
all work, but here goes!” The same wonder resides in
my thoughts about Project Cause but the sharing I have experienced
from the entire world has renewed my faith that together we
are a powerful entity, as ONE we can do and create anything.
Thank you all so much for coming together and making this
vision our reality.
I also encourage you
to "register" your voice after you Fire the Grid
by sharing both your greatest joy and your own experience
on July 17 at 11:11 GMT. You can do this as an individual
or as a group, and will be the beginning stages of a new worldwide
online community of like-minded, high vibratory individuals.
The coming days and months will be exciting times indeed and
this community will blaze the trail for our children's future.
I leave you with a
quote from Edgar Cayce regarding rebuilding the world, he
said,
“Peace in the
world must begin first within the heart
and purpose
and mind
of the individual…
[for] as individuals change themselves and their interactions
with one another, eventually the world cannot help
but follow.”
Margarete Mitscherlich
born 1917
and
The first
doc and the fiction had one thing in common, the name Margarete,
my grandmother's name.
Margarete Mitscherlich - ninety years old - what an incredible
woman.
But I choose to talk about "Der
Grenzer und das junge Maedchen" with its all too painful
subject
- people helping people to cross a border, in this case the
Polish-Ukraine border to Germany
- a Mafia situation ..
The thin, black-haired actress - Margarita
Breitkreiz -
enticed me with a liveliness in her face the kind of which I've
rarely seen.
The male actor, a border policeman,
supposed to teach his Polish-Ukraine colleagues to be more effective
in carrying out the EU regulations
plays a hapless anti-hero, "so lieb and hilfreich, doch
ohne Feuer und Pfeffer", as his ugly wife says.
The end is as sad as these dramas are in life, and I don't want
to give it energy.
The man dreams of a world, where people "understand"
each other,
and I would add, - a world without such horrid borders.
This is a dream not too far away from today, the 17th of July
2007.
But what I'm GRATe-FULL for is not the reality, which comes
to life in such a sad way,
nor the failure of the man to change his life and love,
but the courage to make such a movie and to bring to the fore-front
both,
an anti-hero and a heavenly actress such as this Margarita Breitkreiz. Several people said to me in my life:
"When you laugh, the sun breaks through
the clouds", But this fades compared to the life and
smile and laughter in the face and body of this woman.
I'm GRATe-FULL to you, Margareta Breitkreiz, for having shown
me,
how I too can lighten up the world by my very face, its liveliness
and laughter.
Margarita Breitkreiz
born 1980 [a video on her website
gives an idea of her
lifeliness and laughter]
23:58
I am GRATe-FULL for the shower of GRATe-FULL-ness on this day of "Firing
the Grid"!
2007_07_18-19-I've
taken 2 more days to tell the beginnings of my learning GRATe-FULL-ness
and to correct my July 17 Diary of GRATe-FULL-ness, and shall
now accept all its imperfections.
But I shall go on with remembering the
people in my life, who have given me gifts,
may the gifts have been small or big or gigantic,
may they have come in a loving way
or may they have come as "triggers"
that pointed out holes in my wholeness that wanted to heal.
I started with a Biography of GRATe-FULL-ness.
But it would take me years to complete this.
So the examples may show , how I remember these names:
always within circumstances, situations, locations and time-periods
and always with at least one memory and one feeling.
1938-1944 Stuttgart and Borna bei Leipzig:
I thank my mother , Maria Berge-Guth [1909-1985]
and my father, Siegfried Guth [1911-1943]
for having agreed to conceive, birth and raise me,
believing in my strength to grow through the challenges which
their personalities would provide me with.
I thank my grandmother, Margarete Ende-Berge,
who took me in her arms lovingly, before she died half a year
after my birth
I thank my grand-aunt Ottilie, my grandmother's sister,
who gave us shelter from the bombardments in Stuttgart for
some months in Borna/Leipzig
I thank my aunt Anneliese Penner, my mother's sister, my
god-mother,
for having related to me probably lovingly
during the few times we met during the war.
I thank my grand-aunt Lili Ende, my grandmother's sister
and my grand-uncle Reverend Paul Ende, my grandmother's brother,
whom I did not meet, but who both wrote to me when I was small,
and thus gave me the opportunity to express myself in the
first letters of my life [I remember one sentence to uncle
Paul:
"I'm glad that my mother tongue is German, since it seems
to be such a difficult language to learn"
I thank Erna Wahl,
the "Pflichtjahrmaedchen" (during the war girls
were obliged to serve as family-helpers for one year),
and her mother, Frau Wahl,
for having related to me, when I was small,
thus they must have given me a different perspective on my
down-trodden self-image.
1944 March until 1946, December, evacuated
to Wolfartsweiler bei Saulgau
I thank the villagers of Wolfartsweiler,
who between March 1944 until December 6, 1946
related to me and made me grow:
I thank my first love, Lisa Kemmer, 9, when I was 8,
and whom I met again in 1953 and in 1983, when she was a Franciscan
nun,
At the age of about ten I waited for her rare letters, like
a lover waits..
In the early nineties I got a letter, in which she wrote about
St. Francis,
that "work" shouldn't be done out of obligation,
but out of gratitude!
I thank the family , Herr & Frau Reck,
who were forced to accept us – evacuated from the city
– in their old-age house
their daughter, the widowed Frau Spaet, who occupied another
room in that tiny house,
and I thank especially Margot, Frau Spaet's daughter, age
3-when I was 6,
who showed me, when she once sat to eat with us our meager
meal and refused to eat it,
that it was possible to say "no" to a grownup person.
Febr. 23, 2010:
There are ever so many names, which appear in my memory in ever so
many situations and moments,
- will I ever "come around" to inserting them in this wondrous
"list"?
I AM GRATe-FULL
to the people in My Past in the year when they
first came into my life.
The names in grey mean, that I know for certain,
that they are dead.
Many others may have died without my knowledge.
I omitted all titles, even if I didn't know the first name
of some minister or professor.
Some years maybe inexact, but rarely
1938 Siegfried Guth
Maria Guth 1939 Ursula
Guth-Kasper
1940
1942 Eberhard
Guth
1943
1944 Anna Knoll
Erwin Knoll
Anna Bosch,
Anna's Mother
Herr Gerai
Hildegard
Frau Naegele 1945 Elisabeth Kemmer
Lydia
1946 Frau Wennagel
1947
Helmut Strebel
Family Fabarius
the sister of Helmut Strebel
1948
Heide Kloeckner-Fuessler
Elisabeth [Haug]
Thile Wendel
Ursula Buettner
Eva Wurster
Helga Baumgaertner
Ursula Merz-Hobson
1949 Helmut Strebel
Beatrix Grabert Frau Kenngott
Frau Hangleiter
Ottmar
The girl who helped me with the basket
I AM GRATe-FULL
to you,
the people in My Present
[2007-
with notes on July 20, 2011] in the year when they came
into my life
1950
Barbara Buetterlin-von Gottberg [she is very sick and
in a wheelchair with cancer
but so far wrote once a year - to my birthday]
1959 Anke Ristenpart [she seems to have left
my life, and I know why]
1960
Joel Rosenzweig
Dita Rosenzweig-Liron
1963
Immanuel Rosenzweig
Martin Kasper
1965
Ronnit Rosenzweig Shai
Yanina Zimnovodzki
Alexander Zimnovodzki
Iris [Zimnovodzki] Alisa Zimnovodzki, her
elder sister [I haven't seen these
two for many years]
1966
Micha Rosenzweig
Yael [Zimnovodzki] [I haven't seen her
for many years]
Michael Guth [the last e-mail contact
was in 2010]
Gabriele Dietrich [we parted from each
other consciously]
1970
Levi Abargil - Bar-Gil [following the separation
between them
and Efrat, his worker, at the end of 2010,
all contact between him and me stopped]
1976
Tova Rosenzweig [Joel's wife]
Gid'on Liron [Dita's husband]
1982
Ruth Rosenzweig [since she is
Immanuel's ex-wife,
it can't be helped that I see her from afar sometimes]
1983
Uri Shai [Ronnit's husband,
with whom there once was a very good, even deep relationship,
but not so nowadays]
1984
Ya'acov Hayat [we froze our
communication on Nov. 4, 2010,
and with more determination again in Febr. 2011,
but the time for us will come...]
1986
Irene Sonnabend [While together
in Ireland she asked me
-lovingly - to move away from her.
Still there were some e-mail exchanges]
1986
Moshe Klein
Orit Hayat
1987 [we haven't met for
years] 1987
Ra'ayah Rosenzweig 1988
Elah Rosenzweig
1989
Ran Lichtner [we are not in contact,
but we know about each other]
1990
?
1991
Jonathan Shai
Alon Rosenzweig
Gadi & Efrat & Maya Lybrock [we are not in contact,
but we know about each other] Meirav Meidan [we are not in contact,
but in Dec. 2010 she invited me to give a workshop]
1992
Cornelia Maas
Renata Dobryn [in 2011 she suddenly
sent a letter,
but after a few exchanges she gave up again, or so it seems]
1993
Michal Dror [we are not in contact,
but we know about each other]
Rotem Shai
Yahel & Shira Hayat [I haven't met them
for some years]
1994
Tomer
Rosenzweig
Amit Lybrock [the last time I met
him, was 2009]
1995
Maya Dror [the last time I met
her, was 2005] Dvorah Silversteyn [we stopped contact]
1996
Yael
Shai
Arnon Rosenzweig
1997
Avi Dror [after his racist behavior
on Dec. 29, 2009
I've no intention to meet with him again,
and he, anyway, does everything to delete me]
1998
Tamir Peleg [after Tamir's wedding
with Hilah in 2010,
and after the birth of their son,
we were in contact till my visit in Jan. (?) 2011]
1999
Sarah & Shimon Peleg [the last time I saw
them was on the brit
of Tamir's son.
Later I wrote letters - but Shimon couldn't cope]
Itamar Shai
Ayelet Rosenzweig
Efrat Rosenzweig
1999
Yuval-David + Paz Ron Zuckermann [since my visit in Oct.
2010 there is no contact]
Lior Oren
Hagai Lev
(+parents and sister) [since Hagai's wedding
in 2010 there is no contact]
2001
2002
2003
Na'ama Ya'ari [we are not in contact,
but we know about each other]
2004
Narda&Ori Lanlib [we are not in contact,
but we know about each other]
Samira Al-Jabareen
Yahia Al-Jabareen
Hathra Al-Jabareen
Yusuf Al-Jabareen
Ahlaam Al-Jabareen
Ateeq Al-Jabareen
Qaasem Al-Jabareen
Ayman Al-Jabareen (Faraj & Saaber)
[It
is on this day, July 20, 2011,
that I decided to separate from them,
see my Hebrew letter to Tzippi and Gal
at the end of this page]
Tzipi Winkler
Shifra Winkler [I haven't seen her,
since she - Altzheimer sick - is in an institution ]
Avi Winkler [he let me sleep at
his house, when Regina's family was with me in Oct. 2010]
Boris Aronson
Dina Straat
Meshi Taib [the last time I met
both, was at the funeral of Dina's father, but they don't
keep contact with me]
Gal Mor
Ofir, Meital and Lior Cohen
Diana& Israel [some month ago we tried to
reconnect,
but it didn't work out between us]
2005
Amit
Cohen[was
born]
Nitza&Shalom Be'eri [my neighbors]
Albert and ? [my neighbors]
Mika Rosenzweig
2006 Shir [who is that?]
Shulamit [there is no eye-contact,
no "Shalom" between us
Eduard, my computer-helper [he disappeared]
2007
Eliahu + wife my neighbors, whom I
met only once in the last years
Kalman+Hanan, my neighbors [who are those? I don't
even remember them] As to my German relatives
- I don't know if they are in my life or not
my niece Regina Kasper
[she visited me with her husband Ralf
and her twin-daughters, Christina and Dominica
in October 2010
my nephew Hartmut Kasper
my niece Heidelinde Kasper [she writes around Christmas]
my nephew Wolgang Kasper my nephew Michael Guth,
Karin&Shanon
my niece, Marita Guth
my aunt Anneliese Penner died in 2010
my cousins Gretl and Ushi Penner+their families
July 20, 2011 It seems,
that whoever came into my life since,
did so only for a short time,
like Markus, the German in Texas,
and J., the Jew in Minnesota,
with whom an e-mail exchange took place
for some months
about "How to heal into Wholeness".
But when I felt,
that they didn't really want to move
and even ignored my quest
to communicate with each other,
I wrote: "Don't contact me,
until you'll have met each other".
There were also people from the far past,
like Barbara and Hanna Huber,
who wanted to renew contact,
but they soon were triggered too much by me.
There was also an e-mail exchange,
intitiated by me,
with Damon from the Godchannel Forum in 2001-2,
but we triggered each other too much.
There was a "reunion" with Naftali and Naomi Raz
only recently,
but they, too, seemed to have been triggered too much,
nor was I really interested in coping with them.
I also want to remember the many people whom
I met on "The Walk about Love"'
during 9 weeks from March to May 2009
some only from far,
some from near
some from very close
and some people whom I met
in France and in Ireland
in June-July 2010
Herbert and Elinor,
then the sons of Irene Sonnabend
and the hosts of my bed&breakfast
I AM GRATe-FULL
to people whom I never met all these people -may they
be real or fiction - helped me
or are are helping me to live.
I insert them in the time-period not in which I learnt about
them, but in which they became meaningful for me.
In the Forties
In the Sixties Mordechai Zeira
Yitzhak Rabin
Nomi Shemer
Nechama Leibowitch Marcel Marceau
In the Seventies Chaim Weitzman
Herzl, Pinsker
Fritz Perls
In the Eighties Nurit Hirsch
In the Nineties
Since 2000
Adam
Eva
Cain
Abel
Henoch
Noah
Abraham
Sarah
Hagar
Ismael
Isaac
REbecca
Ya'aqov,
Lea
Rachel
Juda
Josef
Leonarda da Vinci
Rembrandt
Van Gogh
Bach
Haendel
Beethoven
Mozart
Brahms
Moses
Eliya
Jeremia
Saul
Jonathan
David, King
the poet of psalm 139
the poet of Canticum
the poet of Qohelet (Ecclesiastes)
Albert Schweitzer
Rainer Maria Rilke
Heinrich Waggerl
Theresa de Avila
Jesus
Maria
Josef
Paulus
Rabbi Yehoshua ben Chanania
Rabbi Tarfon
Rabbi Yehoshua ben Levi
Rabbi Aqiba
Rabbi El'azar of Modi'in
Rabbi Shim'on ben Yohai
R. Eliezer ben Shim'on ben Yohai
Rabbi Shim'on ben Laqish (Resh Laqish)
Rabbi Yochanan ben Zakkai
Rabbi Yochanan of Tiberias
Franz Rosenzweig
Erich Neumann
Thomas Harris
Shelley Yates
and Anael and Bradfield
not completed
Since August 2011 I'm using
this space
to document the names of people
who returned to my life
mostly only for one time,
by mail, phone or face to face,
and - should it happen at all -
the names of "new" people.
August 1, 2011:
Ran Lichtner
Aug.5, 2011
a woman whose name I must not exhibit surprised
me
Tzippi was about to fly to India-Ladaq
o n J u l y 2 4, 2 0 1 1 .
Before that she thanked me for my two songs of "self-acceptance", "itfini-enwrap
me " and "See
the nonsense which I allow myself",
and she expressed, how Gal and I had helped her to accept herself.
to 
