no date.
Checked for updates on 2005_03_29
[old version in brackets]

Healing Class - Lesson One
The Quest for the Mother

Part Two: A Call to Healing

This channeling obviously was corrected in "Choosing to Heal"
The changes - in my edition indicated in green - are only four,
but they are quite meaningful according to my understanding.
On the other hand - there are updates in this file,
which are missing in "Choosing to Heal".

pp35
"When she is ready,
and in the ways she wishes [old version: wants],
I will bring the Mother
the healing power of my true Light,
the Light of love, understanding and acceptance.
As you and I work together
on your awakening
to who you truly are, [old version: to Self],
I hope you'll also work with me
in bringing healing to the Mother.
[version in "Choosing to Heal": in helping to heal the gap between the Mother and me]
I hope you choose to do this.

"I must point out that it is your choice.
Free will would be meaningless
if you didn't have this choice.
I also want to say
that whatever you choose
in this or any matter [missing in the old version]
is always the right choice for you [old version: is the right choice for you],
and I will always support you in it.

pp11
"This class is about healing.
You will heal yourself
as you learn to channel my loving Light through your own spirit
[old version: as you learn to channel my Light through yourself ]
to the parts of the Mother in you that need it.
And as you heal yourself,
you and I will also heal the rest of Creation.
[ version in "Choosing to Heal": you will help heal the rest of Creation.]

"Just as I am within you, so is the Mother.
You can know my presence within
as your aspirations,
your highest, most loving thoughts and ideas.
[old version: your thoughts and ideas.]
You can know the Mother's presence within
as your desires, your feelings, emotions and passion.
The name I know her by is 'Desire'.
[old veThe name I best know her by is 'Desire'.]

"Illness, suffering and even death
are the result of the harm
that has come to Desire,
to true feelings and emotions.
You have inherited,
as have all beings in Creation,
the original imprints
caused by hostile light
[old version: caused by the hostile light ]
that is still trapped in the Mother.

"For a long time
after the Mother and I
became aware of each other,
I blamed her for the bad feelings
I sometimes got from her.
I wasn't yet aware of her imprints
or that I had caused them.
Neither of us knew that the bad feelings
about seemingly innocent things I did
were caused by her deepest imprints being stirred.
[old version: were caused by something that stirred her imprints.]

In modern psychological terms,
'She was triggered by my behaviors
which caused her to reenact her original trauma.
[version in "Choosing to Heal": which caused a reenactment of the circumstances of her original trauma.]
[old version: Which caused her to recapitulate her original trauma.]
What happened originally between us
[old version: And what has happened between the Mother and me]
is still happening now inside of you.

"For a long time after I became aware
that the Mother had been seriously damaged by her deep imprints,
[old: of the Mother's deep imprints and that she was damaged by them,]
I still blamed her for them.
I couldn't remember doing anything to her myself. I felt
[old version: I couldn't remember doing anything to her and I felt]
that it must have been someone else who had done this,
no doubt 'Lucifer'.

"Most of the messages I have sent to humanity
[old version: "Most of the messages I have sent so far]
through my prophets, teachers and channelers
have been skewed by the blame
I had for the Mother.
Patriarchy and prejudice against women
are reflections of my original blame that still remain.
[old version: are reflections that still remain of my original blame.]

Without going into a lot of detail now,
I'll say [old version: suffice it to say]
that the least serious thing I did because of her bad feelings
was to ignore her.
More serious actions [old: things] included
banishing her from heaven
and ostracizing and humiliating her
in front of all the beings we had created together.

"The worst thing I did was
to turn the other way
as my denied power took the form of Lucifer
and mercilessly tortured her for most of eternity
in a place that can only be called Hell.

"You may be thinking
that surely God could not have done these things.
But I know now that I did do these things,
although for a long time I was in denial of it.

Apology to the Mother

"Because I am no longer denying the damage that the Mother has suffered,
I can help her heal it.
[old version: "Because I am no longer denying it, I can heal it.]
And this is my intention.
The road thus far has been long and twisted,
with many false starts and dead ends.
Now that the truth of what has happened is exposed,
I will never again be able
to go into denial about these things.

"I will never again turn away from the Mother or her pain.
The road ahead is quite different
than where we've been so far in Creation.
The new road begins here.

"There are no words adequate
to convey the depth of my sorrow
for what my denied [old: bad] light has done to the Mother.
I can only express this in Creation
and specifically in the ways
that I make it up to her.
Until now, Creation has been Spirit's [old: God's] thing.
The Mother's role was either ignored or minimized.

"I begin my apology here
with this message to the Mother,

" 'I am sorry I used my power
to protect and glorify myself
at your expense.
I know now that you never meant me any harm
and that what I saw as ugly in you
was my own reflection.
I understand now that the true power and glory of Creation
is in your deepest and most sensitive Desire.
[old version: is in your Desire.]]

My love, [missing in old version]
I am now ready to fulfill the promise
I first made to you.
I now make it so
that your Desire is my will.
I'm sorry I took so long to get that right.
And I will demonstrate
my seriousness and sincerity to you
beginning now.'

"This is the end of the first lesson in this class.
I have much more to say about the Mother and me,
and in other lessons
I will share some practical methods
that will make it easier to do the healing work
I've begun to describe here.

In the meanwhile, I would like you read
the page on judgment
[in .quest3: releasing judgments.]
Also, recommended reading for this class
is Right Use of Will by Ceanne DeRohan."

[The following "Note" I discovered only on 2005_03_29 and updated on 2008_06_08
It was obviously restored after the re-appearance of the Files which concern Right Use of Will]
Channelers note:
For a much more detailed understanding of the issues between Spirit and the Mother, and her deepest wounds,
we second Spirit's suggestion to read the series of books by Ceanne DeRohan called Right Use of Will.
You can order the books directly from the author at: RightUseof Will.com.
There are eight books in the series,
and it is strongly recommended to start with the first one, Right Use of Will, and read them in order.
The author of the books is in no way connected with this site.

Next: Healing Class Lesson Two: The Spirit Polarity

Healing Class Discussion

Return to Part One, Before Time Began

Part Three: Choosing to Heal.
This link is not mentioned in the updated file .
As I said , this is the same as Part Two , except for 4 changes
But there is a newly added link:

Channelers' note: There is a separate page about Right use of Will with links to an ongoing discussion of the material.