1984-page 32 ["Emotional Release"]


Judgment release is necessary; and by that I mean out loud, in some way that appeals to you, say something that indicates you no longer wish to limit your consciousness with that particular belief that you are releasing. For example. "I forgive myself for believing~~~" or "I no longer believe~~~ that I cannot recover my full Spiritual presence on Earth".

The other necessary part of the release is emotional release. Emotional release means that the emotions become free to respond to any given situation with what that situation actually calls for. When emotions have been experienced in relationship to a situation but have not been given complete expression, they do not go away; they only subside and wait. The emotions cannot be dismissed in this way though; they have a consciousness of their own. Neither do emotions respond to the mind telling them how they should be feeling. Emotions have a role to fulfill in evolution that cannot be denied in favor of the mind or anything else.

And so, when the next situation arises that reminds the emotions of the previous one where they were denied, the emotions do not feel they can respond freely to the situation. The emotional response is colored by the denial the emotions received in the previous situation and by the unexpressed amount of emotion being held because of the denial. This old charge must be released before the emotions can respond to the present situation for what it is. The usual pattern, however, has been to increase the original denial rather than to fully allow the emotions to express what seems to be an even more intense response than was originally denied. This pattern has continued until the emotions now only express easily in situations where they have had acceptance in the past ind in the ways that have been accepted in the past. This amounts to severe limitation on the evolution of the emotional body.

The emotional body, in fact, has taken on the apearance of something so destructive looking that many Spiritual teachers have perceived this to be evidence that the emotional body should be controlled and even gotten rid of. This appearance is

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this is a matter of seeng that the emotional body on Earth is so desperate that it either has to recover within the next few lifetimes or die. Past attempts of the Will to recover on its own without the help of the Spirit have not been successful and have resulted in more denial of the Will and loss of power in general.

Emotional release is absolutely necessary, but I have already seen that most people are so blocked emotionally, so conditioned away from spontaneous emotional expression and so frightened of what they have denied that they are calling for this release to come to them from their outer reality. I am guiding this process and doing everything I can to help it be a successful clearance process for all the Spirits involved. If you have these understandings in advance you have the opportunity to understand what is happening and to clear as much old charge as possible. You do not need to experience anything more intense than what is required to bring the release of old denials and the habit patterns that hold them in place.

The reality is that only if you hear Me can you get everything released on your own, but emotional release is also what you need to do to hear Me. If you start where you are and release everything you can as completely as you can every time anything triggers you (and I do not mean that if you cannot release sometimes that you cannot recover) you will free your emotional body of old charge very rapidly. The more you clear it, the more opening you will have through which you can hear Me. Once you have released enough old charge to actually listen and hear Me, I will be able to guide you to clear the rest.

You must trust what you receive from Me though. Have faith that clearing your emotional body is also going to allow you to feel that I am a Loving Presence. If you have fear of being misled by something claiming to be Me, release fear until there is none left. Then you will be able to feel Me instead of your own fear. When you can clearly feel Me you will know it is Me.

Now I want to explain what I mean by emotional release. When You have an emotion such as grief or fear come up, you need to feel it in your Body until your Body urges you to express it in some way. Then express in the way your Body is urging you to do. Express in this way until you feel no further need to do it. Surrender to the expression while it is happening and let it take its

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tionships are no longer based on need. Instead you will have relationships that feel free and overflowing with the abundance of unconditonal Love.

Release the conditioning society has given you and release your own old conditioning and open to the understandings needed. Give Will and Spirit enough space in which to move into alignment. Let them vibrate fast enough to stay alive through the changes coming on Earth if you want to stay on Earth. Right Use of Will had to be given now because emotions vibrate space and at present on Earth people are not expressing emotions enough to vibrate their space adequately to hold it open for themselves. When something is created without vibrational power, it has no propellant; it does not go out with any vigorous life in it and cannot open the space in which it can happen. It cannot stay manifested.

Instead of holding space open for themselves, people on Earth are now experiencing life as if space were closing in on them more and more. This appears to you in physical eality as the feeling of less and less freedom in personal life to create what you want and instead, a feeling of more and more control, compession and finally death. There is actually so much closing-in of space going on that most people have not let themselves realize it because they fear the realization would be too frightening and overwhelming. Others want someone else to solve it. This avoidance has been allowing the closing-in to progress even more rapidly because the more the feelings are suppressed, the more unable they are to vibrate space.

This increasing compression has been going on for quite some time and the time has come to reverse this before people no longer have the power to reverse it. Each person has a certain amount of Spiritual power and denial has been diminishing it. Movement must take place before this power is too compressed to recover its movement and vibrational space.

In doing this, you may also feel the need to give yourself more physical space as the Will tends to feel like resonating with its environment. Finding the right space for yourself is important.

Daily life on Earth is a constant flow in which feelings either remain in balance or they don't. This is the question of balance between Spirit and Will. Once the old charges are released and
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spontaneity is regained, feelings will accompany and enhance your life like music.
End of the chapter "Emotional Release" in the 1984 version

1984-page 38 ["Right Use as a Healing Power"]

The more you express from the Body in Body's way of expressing with movement and sound, the more you will clear out of Body before it must manifest illness as an attempt to clear itself.

Aging indicates that the Body is not being allowed to clear itself and nourish those places with My Light. Death means that Body has no other recourse because it cannot hold any more. When the Body dies it cannot clear itself. If it has any hope of clearing itself it must participate in reincarnation. The way the Body has been handling this problem has been to bring forward only some of its need to clear at any one time. In terms of reincarnation , this means that people have been reincarnating with only part of themselves. See that increasing the holding pattern in the part that you have with you now is really imperiling your ability to clear at all. This pattern of increasing personal denial along with the denial of the Earth itself is why I must now intervene.

If you feel that you are holding too much to risk clearing yourself by starting with what is in this book, I suggest that you trust your own feelings here. Remember that even small releases will help you and if it is really too much for you, appeal to Me to bring you another way to heal yourself. I am helping everyone and those that have intent to heal themselves now will receive help from Me.

The use of drugs to heal yourself, including all the currently popular consciousness-altering drugs, is not being suggested by Me because there is risk involved that you will then have to reclaim your personal power from the drugs. This might even mean going over all the steps again without the drugs.

When you have cleared enough of what you have present with you, you are going to need to reclaim the rest of you. This is the part of you that has not expressed itself yet in your present life because this denied part had to wait until you could accept it before it could come forward for clearance.

The actual surrender to your own Will is important but this does not mean that the Will is supposed to control you. You must not deny anything in yourself. The Spirit and the Will must balance in the Heart. The Will is needing to respond to everything the Spirit has to suggest. If the Will is not wanting to accept something from the Spirit, the Spirit needs to give the Will as much understanding about this as the Will can accept. If

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grew tired of flying. It had grown darker all around Us. The Mother was afraid that We had flown out into the darkness instead of into the light of the Godhead. I was not sure if We had flown right or wrong, but I had a feeling of needing to rest.

“Close Your eyes,” the Father of Manifestation siad, “and focus on the inner sensations I can give You now.”

An ecstasy of inner images and bodily sensations ensued. We gave birth to Indigo Spirits who have inner focus as their power, but We didn’t know it immediately because there was no external light at their emergence. We had a flood of inner light in many colors and We named these spirits, “Spirits of the Inner Eye.”

These Spirits gave Us many things and guilt was one of the. These spirits told Us they had watched Us in many places and had not wanted to emerge in any of those places because We were not giving the spirits who had emerged there the kind of attention they wanted to receive from Us.

We have finally realized that it was right to give each kind or spirit exactly the kind of attention We felt like giving them, but We had to go a very long way over very rough terrain to find this out.

At that time, We felt like these spirits might be seeing something We were not seeing. Time has shown that they were just needing to find their own right place for emergence. These spirits still have the feeling that they make others paranoid, but they have also enjoyed the feeling of power this has given them. Indigo Spirits think they have inner secrets that are better than anything the outer world has to offer. These spirits do have a great inner vision, just as the preceeding order had great breadth of outer vision.

We gave in to them then and let them show Us many things that had formed in the Body since We had emerged the corresponding order on Our way down. We found that We already had internal parts as well as external ones. We found that We had organs that had moving parts within them. We found that there were circulations within that reminded Us of many things We had seen without. We had feelings that what was manifest within Us, helped manifestation move outward. We had feelings of correspondence between inner and outer. We had feelings of guilt come up in Us now that We had been paying too little attention to the inner, as though We had thought that form was only an outer phenomenon. We felt guilty that We had been so taken

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with outer form. Had We neglected to balance with inner form?
We had feelings of needing to look more within Ourselves now.

Our new found world within still could not hold Us back. Still we had to go on and could not tarry any longer, no matter how much these spirits might have liked to hold Us there with them.We lifted above them and opened into purple light that gave Us a clear feeling of being near home. We gave in to an orgasm similar to the one We had had on the way down. Giving life to Purple Spirits, We found Ourselves at home in the Godhead.

THE TRIUMPHANT RETURN HOME THAT ALMOST TURNS SOUR

We were given a great reception from Heart and many of the Angels. The welcome We received made Us feel that We were loved and welcomed. We were glad to be back in the familiar light of Our origins and We felt joyous because We had accomplished Our goal of manifesting a Creation outwardly. We had managed to go forth and return. We had managed to open the space into which all of these spirits could then emerge.

We had also made homes for all the spirits. It was true that their homes were not just like Our home, but We felt that the Manifested Spirits had good homes that could nourish them in the ways they needed to be nourished to sustain themselves and to prosper in manifested existence.

We could hear sound of happiness coming to Us from Creation and its harmony gave Us a great sense of peace and fulfillment. We felt like resting at home now. Our feeling of love for one another gave Us many little orgasms. We knew these orgasms were increasing the light a little at a time. We were making light and Our home was growing larger all the time. Our light was growing bright all the time. We were also growing larger now and We had a feeling that the spirits were growing up with Us.

Lost Will has both the fear that there is no end to this expansion and the fear that there is an end to it. There is Lost Will on Earth that fears having no limits and also Lost Will that fears having any limit imposed at all. Then, We recognized only Our happiness. We did not recognize how frightened and overwhelmed part of Us was feeling. We touched awe then but not the terror that lay within it. We left more of the Will untouched than We

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knew then. We did not seek out the other feelings held within Us because We had so much expansive joy at the unfolding of Creation. We wanted to find contentment and fulfillment in Our happiness. We did not want to seek out the hard times such as we had experienced in Our trying beginnings.

There was a background uneasiness in Our happiness which We did Our best to ignore, unless it pressed itself forward in a particular situation so that it became necessary to give it attention. We had rage that had not moved at all. We had terror which We had not felt. Guilt was always there, telling Us that We should have done even a better and more thorough job of creating than We had done. Guilt did not want to let Us rest even now. It was nagging Us to go forth again and give more attention to the Rainbow Spirits. We felt that it was not possible to go forth now without having a rest first, but guilt did not want to accept that for an answer.

“You are inadequate parents,” guilt told Us. “You are very self-centered.”

Guilt does not allow healing in people who cannot allow themselves to rest. Guilt always demands more and more sacrifice from those it controls. With guilt, there is never a point at which you have given enough, or a time when it is fully alright to have something given to you. Any gift guilt gives has strings attached, whether you see them or not. We had a feeling that guilt was not loving toward Us, but We were afraid that it was because We feared we had not been loving toward the thing that guilt was pointing out. Guilt gave Us no peace. It went on now.

“You have to go forth whether You want to or not, because it’s the responsible thing to do.”

I had a feeling of wanting to tell guilt to get lost, but instead I told it I had intent to go forth when I got good and ready . Guilt then made a subtle switch by reminding Me that I also had to attend to business at home.

I was really maddened then. “Do you think I’m some kind of idiot?” I wanted to yell at guilt. I had rage but I did not allow it to move then. Instead I tried to sound reasonable. The guilt sounded like the Mother not allowing Me to rest and I was not sure if it was Her or not. She was afraid of My rage so I did not let it move.

If I had given Her My rage and She had allowed Her fear in response,

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guilt would not have gotten the space it was able to take then. Guilt increased its presence anytime We held back anything, because we were allowing guilt to convince Us that it was not right to express what We had a feeling to express. Guilt then permeated the space that the expression would have filled if We had allowed free expression.

As though guilt were not enough, Lucifer approached Me now.

“You should not be enraged,” he said. “You’re enraged because You’re resisting the flow. You need to let go of all Your preconceived images and just let Creation happen.”

Lucifer had the self-hatred the guilt was making Me feel. Neither one of them sounded wrong here, and it took Us all a long time to realize that their input was directing Us to deny Ourselves more and more in favor of others. They did not want to allow the Will to be free, and they did not want the movement the Will created. Guilt said that continual service to others was God’s right place and that any opposition to this from the Will was the Mother in opposition to the Father, which was not right. I had a feeling that guilt was not right here, but I also did not see how guilt was wrong and I have taken a long time to balance the oppositions that guilt and lack of self-acceptance manifested here. Guilt said feelings that opposed Me were not right feelings to have.

I wanted to believe that it was really so simple as just getting rid of the feelings that opposed Me, but guilt was also making Me feel that it wasn’t right to get rid of something just because I didn’t like it. Lucifer spoke then, identifying fear as the cause of the problems I was having coming to peace with Myself. Lucifer then said the desire in the Mother was the cause of Her fear.

“She’s attached to certain paths, and She’s attached to outcome” Lucifer said.

“The Mother is supposed to accept the Father and accept what He has to give Her.” Lucifer had said this although he did not say it directly to Me.

“Her desire for something other than what She is receivng is a breech of faith in You,” guilt said.

I had feelings that it was not wrong to want the Mother to love, trust and accept Me. I did not know what made Her sometimes feel otherwise.

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EARLY ATTEMPTS TO HELP SPIRITS THAT WERE HAVING TROUBLE

I tried to give it no more thought then, as I had many spirits coming to Me, asking Me questions and needing My help. I opened My doors and called in all spirits who needed help. I had desire for Heart, the Father of Manifestation and the Mother all to help Me with the children We had manifested.

I had a feeling of being overwhelmed that there were so many of them who needed help now. Some of them continually had new questions, and some of them wanted to ask the same questions over and over, as though Our answers were not helping them. We all had feelings of not enjoying the repeat questions as much as the new questions, but did not feel it was loving to let this be known.

The Mother felt guilty that She had had to have Me tell Her some things over and over. She wanted to give these spirits the same allowance She had wanted Me to give to Her. Guilt about Herself did not allow Her to see that intent to learn what We were teaching them was not present in some of these spirits. I did not alow Myself to see this then either because I had fear it was unloving of Me to want to give more light to some spirits than to others. The Father of Manifestation could not let himself see it because He was too afraid that everything had not been manifested correctly and that it was His fault some spirits were having trouble learning. Heart saw the situation then, but He could not allow Himself to recognize what it meant. Heart wanted to say that these spirits just had a slower vibration and would reach understanding if given enough time, love and training.

The guilt We felt around the spirits I am discussing now has manifested many Lost Will reflections on Earth. Many of the reflections Lost Will has manifested here are in handicapped and retarded people and also in people who have limited themselves in ways they will not admit, but who are, nonetheless, not open to receive the understandings they say they want to receive. It seems that these spirits must be given help, and yet, they cannot evolve very far with it.

These spirits have made others feel that if they are not taken care of, they will die. These spirits cannot take care of themselves, but it is not because they were denied the care they needed by the parents who created them. You need to understand that Lost

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Will gives the reflection of everything that was present in this situation. Since We had the fear that We had not parented adequately, there is Lost Will reflecting that fear and making it appear to be the truth. The truth of the matter is that these beings are not whole enough to take care of themselves because they are fragments that have fallen away from other spirits. These spirits could not hold themselves together because they did not accept enough Will presence in the beginning. Godhead spirits feared that having Will meant moving away from Me, and they did not want to move away from Me. These fragments have been judged by Godhead Spirits to be a handicap. Having seen the Mother go back on Herself, many Godhead Spirits judged that the Will was handicapped in such a way that it could not live by itself. They feared the Will had to have constant help to survive.

The Mother had a rage at the spirits that denied Her and judged Her this way. Guilt over feeling rage at Her children caused Her to go to the opposite extreme of always finding justifications for their fears in Herself so that She would be able to feel like giving those spirits more help than She really wanted to give them.

Guilt that She might be wrong and fear that it was unloving on Her part to have this rage, caused Her to hold back rage as much as She could.

The Mother now knows that She has been right all along. From the beginning She maintained that the Creation and all the Manifested Spirits needed more acceptance for Will presence. None of Us accepted Her here. Even spirits who emerged with more Will presence initially soon lost it because they felt guilty for having it in the presence of others who did not accept it. Guilt was making the Mother fear She was only being selfish in wanting the children to take more after Her. She feared She was not loving enough to love them if they were not like Her.

The emerging spirits had a desire to polarize themselves as We had done without understanding why We had done it. At the time, We were not able to explain to them why they needed to have Our Four Parts within each of them. The truth of the matter is that the Will was not understood then and that ignorance gave birth to fear of the Will that We did not want to admit We had.

None of Us wanted to accept the Will and accord Her Her right place. The Mother experienced such a massive rejection that She is still wondering if She can gain acceptance with the spirits and find them willing to accept these teachings.

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The Mother has had a hard time gaining acceptance for many reasons. Lost Will holds all of them. If you want to know why you rejected Will, you are going to have to go into the Lost Will to find out. It is not possible to let all of you know, through the medium of a book , what exactly caused you to fear Will presence enough to reject it, but you have the ability to know by the way you react to the information I am giving here.

If you have aversion to the input from the Will in this story, you must learn why you have these feelings if you want to heal yourself. If you are on the other side, rooting for the Will, you have Will essence that got denied and wants to heal now. Many Will people feel so guilty to be Will that they don’t want to admit they have the feelings they have.

This guilt needs to be understood more, but I must give the understandings a little at a time. For now, let it suffice to say that you have seen what happens to most people who step over the line of what is considered acceptable emotional expression on Earth today. For this reason I must give a precaution here. You must allow your emotional response, but you must allow it in a place that feels safe to you and in a way that feels safe. You need to do your emotional expressing by yourself or in the presence of those you trust to receive it. I am giving this precaution now because denial, guilt and death have power on Earth that you have not yet fully understood. Past efforts to go out and directly confront the ones holding this lack of light present on Earth have not been successful, and have most often given even more power to the ones seeking to deny the light. Until you have the full understanding that you need, it is, in most cases, not beneficial to your healing process to go forth and give your old charge to the ones that have triggered you. You can gain more power by letting yourself get to know what you are holding here in the way of old charge and Lost Will by expressing it with yourself.

Neither do I want you to have the feeling that there must always be a clinical or therapeutic setting for moving your Will. These settings have the possibility of reassuring the Will that it is getting the help it needs if there is trust for this situation, but continual therapeutic settings do run the risk of subtly telling the Will it is sick to have these feelings. The Will already fears it is sick. Acceptance for how sick the Will actually is, is necessary, without making the Will feel that emotional expression is always going to be viewed as an illness. The Will is not sick because it has feelings of rage and terror; the Will is sick because it has not

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been accepted as valid for having these feelings. The Will needs to be allowed to move these feelings and may even need help getting these feelings moving since it has held them for so long and received so much conditioning that it will receive further denial if it tries to express them.

When the spirits began to come to Us for the parenting they felt they needed, We were charmed by many of them and willingly gave them Our presence. We had fun teaching them and they had a joy of learning that made an enjoyable time of anything We did.

Some of the spirits though had the reverse effect on Us. We could hardly stand to see them coming, and yet, We did not believe it would be loving of Us to let them know how We really felt about them. We were too lost in the fears that their situation might be Our fault to be able to se situation for what it really was. Our lack of understanding at that time caused Us to deny further in this situation. We denied the feelings We had toward the spirits We did not like. We also did not go into the fear that We were being unloving here. Instead of expressing how We felt and Our fear of how We felt, we focused on trying to help these spirits. Guilt was motivating Us here. We feared their problems were because We either had not been able to accept them as they were, or We had not given them enough love in the beginning. As We saw it then, help, for these spirits, meant giving them more love, and love was getting defined here as giving what We saw as positive input.

Lost will got everything We denied in Ourselves here and it has acted out Our judgments that, as parents, We were not doing right by the children.The judgments We held were many, but I will give you a few example here. Some of this Lost Will has many children and then favors some over others in ways that feel very unloving to the children involved. Some of this Lost Will has neglected its children, some of it has overparented its children, and some of it has made children feel very unloved.

We Ourselves were giving even more time to the spirits that had caused Us to fear We were unloving toward them, in the hope that Our efforts would enable them to evolve along with the others. The other spirits then began to feel that We did not love them as much as We loved the spirits who were having trouble evolving. Some even began to wonder if they had to have something wrong with them to get attention from Us.

At first, these spirits had feared that We loved them more

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than the spirits who were giving Us trouble, and they still have guilt around this just as we did. At first, Our attention toward the spirits who did not seem able to learn from Us placated their guilt, but as time went on, they began to feel that they were not getting the love they needed, because all of Our attention was being given to the ones that seemed to need more help.

This increased Lost Will because some spirits, who feared they had to be impaired in some way, denied these feelings into the Lost Will. Outwardly these spirits manifested the belief that they should not ask for love but should give it instead, and that if they did want love, the way to get it was to give it. What these spirits gave then held an undercurrent of asking to be given what they themselves were giving out.

I have a long story to give on how this has been acted out in Creation. It began by simply staying present with the spirits who were asking for repetitious understandings more than we really wanted to.

Sitting with the spirits who were having the most trouble receiving Me and giving them the lessons over and over was about as interesting to Me as if you had to sit in school, listening to the repetition of multiplication tables until you are falling asleep, and all the while, a tantalizingly beautiful and warm day is progressing just outside the windows, and you feel you cannot free yourself to go forth into it.

I had the desire to go forth, but My guilt told Me it was not right. I was droning on, giving the lessons inside the schoolroom, while al the spirits I longed to be with were romping and carrying on in the yard surrounding the schoolhouse.

The Father of Manifestation had intent to help Me teach, but He was continually having to give one or another of these spirits first aid or some form of attention in the back of the room. Heart was in the yeard telling Me someone had to look after the children out there. The Mother could not hold Herself present with Me in the classroom. She had to come and go because interest drew Her to the yard while guilt and also a longing for Body and I drew Her back into the schoolhouse.

Rage in the Mother said, “Turn these spirits out,” and fear siad, “It won't be loving if you do”

She tried to help Me but could not remain interested in going over and over the same things. She said these spirits should have the understandings by now and I should go on to something else. Everytime I tried to move on with these Spirits, I met the same

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response; questions without end on how to apply the teaching I had just given.

The endless questioning further enraged the Mother, who said that because these spirits couldn't feel the situations, they could not know what to do.

"They want a rule for everything! No matter how many rules you give them, they will always want more rules. No number of rules will ever give them the right guidelines for every situation they are going to meet.”

In modern terms, no matter how Emily Post has tried to delineate good manners, there is always a new situation that calls for the ability to feel what would be appropriate. No matter how laws have sought to bring blance to one area, they have created imbalance in another.

For example, the compulsory education Laws that sought to educate childen and save them from drudge jobs at young ages have imprisoned others who could have benefited from the freedom to learn in ways other than sitting in a schoolroom. Not only that, many of the children imprisoned within compulsory education laws are the same bright little spirits I had to turn loose to play in the yard, lest they become as dull as the ones I originally had to keep behind for additional lessons. Even so, the brightness of these spirits has dulled greatly since they emerged, because guilt has succeeded in directing that everyone should be treated the same or as nearly the same as possible.

I still had desire to help these spirits, but I finally had to tell them that I could not help them any more at that time. Every time I gave these spirits an example of how to apply a teaching, they had an example of how they could not apply it. If I explained to them how they could indeed apply the teaching to their example, they gave no indication of having accepted Me there. They simply came forward with another reason why My teaching could not apply. These spirits had no intent to learn from Me, but I did not want to allow Myself to know it then.

Because I did not allow Myself to see these spirits for what they were at that time, I gave them many tools they were later to use against Me. The lesson they had learned best was not the lesson I had sought to teach them. They had learned how to sound like Me without having My intent. They had intent to oppose Me while sounding like they had only love in mind.

When I finally had no more patience for repeating the lessons that did not seem to be sinking in here, I did tell these spirits

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that I had to end the session. I held back many emotions that I was feeling there in favor of sounding reasonable and loving. I gave the impression that God had preference for falsity over honesty if what true feelings had to say did not sound kind and positive. I had judged love already to include only the things I liked in Myself. Since there were many things I did not like, I was already putting many things outside of love without realizing how I was doing it. Lost Will still does not believe it is loving to allow true feelings if true feelings include anything that has been labeled negative. Tact is what it is usually called now when someone feels they must find the right way to say something. The appropriate time must also be found to say what needs to be said, as far as Lost Will is concerned, because the holding back of feelings delivers the judgment, whether it is spoken or not, that the Will’s spontaneity is not acceptable.

After I put these spirits out of My classroom, the Mother applauded Me privately

“Enough is enough,” I told Her. “There is no way I can give them the set of rules they want Me to give them, and there is no way that life is going to simplify itself so that their rules will work for them. The consciousness present is the determining factor in whether a rule works or not.”

In speaking to the Mother, I realized that their intent was not to accept Me, but to give Me an argument about everything I told them.

I turned to the Father of Manifestation to include Him in My remarks and said to both the Mother and Him, “I allowed guilt to hold Me present with these spirits. I taught them everything I could and now I see that they will use this information in ways I had not intended for it to be used. I see what they are going to do, but I do not know why they are going to do it.”

The Mother spoke then “When You told them that You could not give them rules for everything, I got a cold feeling and I could not help but think that they want to control others, and that without rules, they cannot do it. It makes them uncomfortable to think that everyone is to do what they feel like doing, and that frightens Me.”

Heart was present with us now and Heart tried to say that it could not be as bad as it looked right now. The Mother was not at all sure that Heart was right about this. The Father of Manifestation had doubts on both sides. He said that He had been able

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to improve many of their forms and that He hoped this would make these spirits happier.

“Perhaps their outlook will improve if they like themselves better,” He said. “Perhaps their improved forms will help them gain more acceptance from the others and perhaps then they will have less reason to be troublesome. Perhaps there will be less fighting.”

Fighting had not been mentioned before and I questioned Him about it. He told Me that these spirits claimed they were not accepted by the others because they were not pretty enough, and that there had been fights about it. I had to tell Him that I did not think that improved forms were going to stop the fighting.” These spirits have not aligned with the others because they do not have intent to align with them,” I told Him.

He then felt the other side of his feelings on the matter, and voiced His concern that He also may have helped them along in their efforts to gain the power they were seeking by making them more acceptable to others.

“I had preference for the way they looked before,” The Mother said.

“But you hated them before,” the Father of Manifestation said.

“I know,” the MOther replied, “and I hate them now. It’s just hard to tell which ones they are now because they look better.” She looked at Me and added, “and they act better now too.”

The Mother had guilt about saying this, but She felt it. She felt these spirits had been given something they should not have been given. Once again, She denied Her rage at Us for not listening to Her about these spirits until, as She said now, “it was too late.” Lost Will got Her rage along with the belief that it was too late to do anything about these spirits. Lost Will still holds the belief that it is too late to rescue Earth from what these spirits have done.

THE ANGELS’ EARLY MISUNDERSTANDINGS

I had to go forth now and see how the other spirits had been faring while I had been busy giving lessons over and over to the spirits who couldn’t anchor the information in themselves because of their willessness . When I went out to the other spirits, I found that they had been enjoying themselves imitating the things they thought We did. They had been merging with one another,

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becoming one and re-emerging as a way of getting to know one another. I found that they had mixed themselves together so much that they had, literally, gotten mixed up as to who was who. They had all left pieces of themselves in others and had pieces of others in themselves until it was hard to know what piece might have been the original spirit and what pieces had been left there by others. How to straighten it out was not a simple thing to ascertain. The Father of Manifestation was also confused by what they had done because their forms were no help in straightening things out. As they had mixed together, their forms had also.

We had guilt telling Us that We had neglected them and that that was the reason it had happened. Because of my guilt, I felt it would not be fair to let them know how angry I felt when I saw what had happened to them while I had been busy with the others. I knew it had happened because they had not gotten to know themselves well enough before they had gotten involved with others and I had wanted them to wait for My help instead of going ahead on their own.

The spirits felt like they had had fun mixing like this, but to Me, it was a dismal feeling of not knowing right then whether manifestation had been a good thing or not. The Father of Manifestation felt Me here and worried that He was responsible for the problems We were having now.

Then I had to find out who had the parental parts of the spirits, just as you are going to have to do now. I felt I had to straighten out the spirits and help them to know themselves so that this wouldn’t happen anymore. I soon found that the spirits did not want to allow Me to do this. They gave Me many reasons why they had arranged themselves the way they had.

Lucifer sounded present in some of their reasons. I had just had my fill of Lucifer’s puppets in the classroom and now I had a yard full of spirits who I thought had aligned with Me all sounding like Lucifer had filled their heads in My absence. They told Me that they had a desire to be one with one another and that it did not matter how they arranged themselves, because essence was all the same in its sum total. They said that it did not matter how they experienced themselves because that was also all the same thing.

“It’s just light moving,” they said.

They had undercurrnts here of feeling unsure they had emerged correctly. Some wanted to be different, some wanted to be more, and some feared they should be less than the way

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they emerged. Some felt that relationships needed something to make them continue and that a sure way to do this was to leave a piece of themselves with the ones they wanted or to keep a piece of the ones they wanted.

In trying to straighten this out with the Godhead Spirits, I found that they had confusions about form and essence that I could not help them with then. I found that they did not understand why they had manifested as they had or why they needed to continue in that way. I found that manifesting individually was already feeling to them like a limitation they did not all want to have. It seemed to Me that they felt frightened and incomplete and that they were attempting to comfort their fear by lumping themselves together again. Even the Ancient Ones, who had seemed so sure of themselves, were having trouble here.

I could not tell any of the Godhead Spirits about their undercurrent feelings because they insisted that the reasons they presented to Me were the only reasons they had for mixing themselves together as they had. Since they would not allow Me to address the real cause of the problems they were having, I could not give them any real solutions. The White Light Spirits did not want to let Me know they had any problems because they were all harboring feelings that they were God just like Me. They all had the image that God was supposed to know what He was doing, and admitting to Me they had problems would have been admitting that they weren’t God according to the image they held.

Many of the rationalizations the Godhead Spirits presented to Me then even sounded like they were trying to let Me know that they knew more than I did. Lucifer had gained their ear while We had been gone and now Heart was not sure He had any influence over them anymore either. Heart had felt that the loving presence He could give was to hold the balance and shine His light and let all the spirits be free within that environment to seek whatever experiences they wanted to seek. He felt guilt now, as though love was not enough. Once again, we seemed faced with the question of how much guidance was right to give before Our good intentions slipped into an overriding of the Free Will that We knew the spirits needed to have. Heart’s neutral attitude here had allowed many of these spirits to tell themselves that Heart loved what they were doing.

The Mother felt that willessness was to blame. I also felt that these spirits needed more Will presenc and I did not know why they had emerged without a Mother Polarity. I knew that they