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See below: Communication with Deity on 2004-10-02
2014
The FELT days 275, 276 ~ of the next 15 FELT years [see
linear time-line]
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1 5 y e a r s = 5 4 8 0 days of g e f u e h l t e - g e f u e l l t e Z e i t "inmitten der Ewigkeit", f e l t - f i l l e d t i m e "amidst eternity" from the beginning of my 76th till the completion of my 90th year [unless I'll die after all] The feeling chosen from a day is exhibited in max. 7 lines per day since August 28, 2013 Since March 25, 2014, the only documentation of my life is distilled in "Felt Days"!! My role in the manifestation of the Tent-Vision is implied in the biblical tent quote! Since April 10, I sculpt "Felt Day" in Hebrew, prepared for and inserted as ".png". Names in "Felt Days" appear on top in English, so they can be found in "Search" |
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on my next Felt Day in Godchannel>expression6 |
June 9, 2014 - OHEL 122 from among its 365 appearances in the Bible
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When we reached the Ramon-Crater and sat at its edge
high above - Mika finally emerged from her hurt-finger-mood [left
and middle].
We turned back , north, again pass the Succayah towards the road [Bahat
1] that leads to Egypt, crossed it, entered
the "Firing Zone".
In Nakhal
Yeter, the wadi, where Itai
Harari spend that night with me and where I understood that he and Tal were
to be my "successors",
and where, I hope,the first Ohalah/Rihlah will rise up in a wadi -
polluted by army sand-mounds- that runs down from the west into that
splendid wadi,
we found shade (it was still hazy chamsin!) under a small overhanging cliff
(where Arnon and Mika are standing), and had some food.
Across our cosy corner I spotted a species of my
beloved rotem.
Around us was what I call "desert earth", with its humble beauty,
which Mika and Micha so delighted in:
the kind of stones and June-flowers and fruits on a karakas-shrub
and the traces of bird-feet that stepped on the soil when it was mud.
We moved back to the Egypt-Road, drove
west some more kilometers and reached
Bor Khamat
It was there at the ancient cistern, that Mika became enthusiastic and so
much her great self,
that she gently urged me to come around to the steps, climb down and put
my feet into the water.
"Here I would like to stay",
she exclaimed.
One last site I wanted Mika - and also Arnon and Micha - to see
- the upper part of Nakhal Nizzana, where I had planned the first "Midbaron",
and where in 1995 the drama of "Fight
for a Tree and Flight to Egypt" took place,
refused to open itself to us.
Though the jeep jumped across the bumpy entry, we soon hit barbed wire across
the track.
We had to let go.
I said: "I understand wholly, totally that this
is right! For the time is not right for a Midbaron!
The service-places for the Ohalot/Rihlaat will be those that already exist,
like Mitzpe-Ramon."
And yet: see how we - Itai-Tal-Ilai and I - reached the same junction 10
days later,
but turned to the southern Nakhal Nizzana, and walked
to the "sacred" Elah....
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That
was how my lovely Mika woke up on my bed, in an angle of 90° to where she was supposed to. The lonely purple flower we detected in the Wadi, when we - together- gathered the garbage there. We tried to burn a heap of cardboard, carelessly thrown aside by the construction-workers above, but after some 10 attempts of both of us we let go understanding that it probably was too dangerous. |
Crazy Mika sweeps the floor dancing, singing, shouting
From ever so many situations, there'll be saved in
my memory just what I managed to photograph:
Mika's obsession with learning a clip about "don't
smoke cigarettes", until she knew it
by heart,
and the togetherness side by side on my bed of my eldest and of my youngest
granddaughter.
[The clip was meant for Imma, and
yet when Imma came the next day,
Mika didn't want to sing the song herself, but dragged Imma to the computer,
so she could put her hand on scenes, which she didn't want Imma to see or
hear,
so she wouldn't be hurt!...]
The compositions above and below
show the victory of communication between Mika and the childrenn of my closest
neighborhood,
which wasn't won easily.....
Except for Lior and Amit, the kids of my landlords, these children are newcomers
[Russian immigrants),
and what delights me: they all play on the street instead with smartphones:
Wlada and David, Lior and Amit, Mika, Liel and 4 year old Lia.
Elah and I are invited to watch a show on my veranda,
(Mika whispers to me: it's making fun of
a desert-woman),
in which we had to guess, what figures they were representing, like Lior was
Ya'aqov and Mika was Rachel.
Though Mika remarked that Lior "stole" most of the show, in these
light-and shade scenes she looks happy.
Mika's mother about Mika alone with Savta at Arad:
June 10, 2014 - OHEL 123 from among its 365 appearances in the Bible
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: joytemple@012.net.il
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 Nili Dor-Ha-Ella and Haggit Almakis mention a book by Lucia Capacchione The Art of Emotional Healing in Hebrew: ha-yaeled shae-bekha |
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The
3rd session on the 2nd of the 3 days of the Feeling-Conference 
There was a technical problem, Nili couldn't get Adit ben-Porat on the screen. The way she voiced her pressure and the way she transformed it into a standup comedy, sometimes just funny, sometimes with some teaching, was so authentic, that I found it even easier to cope with the poor way in which she had related to my post at the end of the session with Yael Arbel. ["too long, and you have missed out on what happened later in the session, I DID say, body has to be shaken (le-har'id)"] |
Two
samples of "questions" (to Haggit) by about 140 participants 
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I want you to enhance and to not distort,
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on my next Felt Day in Godchannel>expression6 |
2004
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2004_10_02; last update: 2010_04_06
To YOU AS ONE,
SPIRIT~WILL~HEART~BODY
On July 3, 2003 I closed "Healingkiss",
or so I intended doing.
I didn't intend, though, to stop communicating with Deity in writing.
But until this day I never opened these pages.
What a pity.
I am now re-connecting to that beneficial routine,
by quoting the main message contained in the
last communication in June 2003,
and then I'll make a new start from my
present life situation in the Desert.
2003_06_10
"....The one question which scares , is the implied change
from "not doing anything on the exterior level
to again "doing" something on the exterior level."
"Well, it's no big deal to "not do anything
on the exterior level",
when you retreat from the exterior level.
The big deal is to NOT DO,
but to BE,
while interlinking with so many aspects of the exterior level."
...
"You will always do,
because that's natural,
look at your grandkids, not a second are they not doing.
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"But your doing was immersed in so much suffering,
that it often counteracted the benefit for those people,
for the world at large,
for which you cared so much.
"Now it is different.
Now your neediness,
yes that's the word - neediness not need! -
for "doing" something to reduce suffering ,
which despite all your rephrasings still hid behind everything you did ,
this neediness is gone.
"What is
left is that great joy in meeting challenges,
and in creating with the materials of life and with people,
which you have advocated at the end of your"Partnership"
time
as the sole motive for any action and
activity,
but you were a bad model then.
You'll be a good model now...
...
"and feel the benefits you reaped from time-pressure and dead lines,
after all,
and then you'll not need these measures anymore,
for you'll be trained in living moment by moment
with that intensity of learning, creating, loving,
which is needed to truly and profoundly feel
satisfaction and contentment,
accomplishment and fulfillment,
and great great joy. "
2004_02_10
I read again in your "Letter
from God to Those Doing the Healing Work":
"The makers, like the seekers... know that a train should be coming...
but the makers know that it won't come unless they manifest it.
And they have dedicated their lives to making it so...
that indeed a train does come.
Among the makers of humanity are those of you who are doing this healing work...
manifesting your own healing into wholeness,
and by extension, the healing of all Creation.
Manifesting the coming of the train!
Being among the Makers!
How is it that you put me in between these
extremes
the "efficiency" of Offer Dehan and the "inefficiency"
of my partners, Tamir and Hagai, and the Bedouins?
How can I resonate with both and bring about a fruitful marriage between
west and east?
Between those who make things happen , while overriding their feelings and
other people's feelings,
and between those who "let" things happen, yet not from choice,
but from succumbing to fear and lack of self-esteem?
"We listen with great compassion, concern and hope."
How come, that you, who have all the power, look at me with hope?
"We have
the power to manipulate you as marionettes. But that's not what we or you want, is it? Just like you are training yourself to "walk humbly" with Hagai and Tamir and the Bedouins so we "walk humbly" with humankind and with you in the forefront." |
You
know what YHWH demands from you: |
But how can this be done without just waiting, being patient and denying impatience?
"That's exactly the point,
how not to deny the impatience.
And it starts with your accepting wholeheartedly yourself."
I feel what you mean, but can you spell it out for me?
"Faced with Offer you do both,
admire and judge him.
You admire him for his sweeping planning and executing of what he planned,
taking every unexpected event with lightness and humor
and not letting himself be pressured .
There is much to learn for you from this lightness and letting go of what
you planned.
On the other hand you judge him for being so swept away by exterior doing
and interacting
and you even feel some glee about him causing himself this back pain, glee
which says:
'you see, where this leads to: your rushing
forward , trampling down the feelings, which don't want to rush so much?'"
Yes I admit, that this is so.
Am I rationalizing my inability to be efficient and light at the same time?
"You most definitely are rationalizing.
Which would be unnecessary if you would release the judgments involved.
Look at both Offer and Hagai as two different puzzle pieces.
each has something to teach you.
And -
- don't worry about what they have to learn for themselves.
This is none of your business.
They
are just actors in your drama, they are your teachers.
Respect their choices, their experiences, do NOT judge them. "
I am sighing: How much do I yearn for ceasing to judge!
"They are both reflections of what
you desire as well as what you deny.
"Offer aggrandizes your wish to be efficient, i.e. to get things done
but he also reflects your desire to take it easy,
not to make a drama of everything,
in other words to let go of fear, or rather the judgment,
that if things don't develop the way you planned them or think they should
happen, some catastrophe will occur.
And it's not relevant for you, if Offer is just feigning this lightness, while
inside he may be pressured after all.
He reflects the lightness you yearn for. Period.
Hagai on the other hand reflects your desire for letting things evolve according
to their inner rhythm ,
their timing, which is in tune with everything else.
Again, it is not relevant for you, that or if Hagai may be simply rationalizing
his inability to get things done.
He is there to reflect to you your desire for letting go of the judgment,
that his way of seemingly not-doing will result in a catastrophe.
"Whatever those two have to learn - having attracted YOU into their lives
too -
will happen much faster, if you yourself are whole with the experience you
create with them.
"We cannot
repeat this often enough, dear co-worker;
Let go
of judgments towards yourself and towards everyone else
and endeavor to transform every judgment - and blame
- into the question:
'what do they reflect to me , what denial or what desire?'
"
I have tried this so often...
"Poor Me!.....
Are you pitying yourself for not being "more efficient" in healing?
Come one. You are on your way , and yes it's still in darkness...
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I so often feel like Sisyphus, "Yes, we know it seems to be like
that. [I translate from Martin Buber's German
Edition of Chassidic Stories:] The Tzaddik answered:
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Sisyphus too I observed, Homer, Odyssey 11.(576-600)
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"Moreover, let us say this:
You have NOT followed the "recipe" above so far.
You tried NOT to judge, NOT to blame.
but this is a negatively phrased intention and you know the fate of those...
Transform the judgment or the blame into a challenge:
what is the lesson?
Train this now as your one assignment in your life.
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"To make
space for other pieces?" That is a strange image, I can't grasp
it yet.
"Never mind.
Let go of "the others" now.
Concentrate on transforming judgments and blames into lessons.
'what do they reflect to me , what denial or what desire?'
Every single time.
Make it a game!
Try to do this in writing, so you'll have a list of one hundred judgments
and blames within a month.
and then let's look at those and see if you have become proficient...
Thank you very much, and don't let me struggle on my own.
"You are never alone, it's a matter of being
in communion with us, which lets you sense this!"
A song about the bruised reed and dark wick.
Some hours later:
I was stung by a hornet or an over-sized
wasp,
There are many around here at "Rakhaf" and I was never afraid.
Now I am - after all the pain and itching during 28 hours.
The messenger came, when I couldn't stop beautifying the "Succah",
which is the main physical space on this hill, where we are guests,
in order to work from here , from our tents, on our vision.
"Busy Bee", said this animal and stung.
The obsession with doing , even if I like the doing very much,
is preventing me from being and from resonating my being.
2010
2010_04_07
Maybe, I'm allowed to plant a few trees after all? [2014:not
yet. All trees died except for one Passiflora!]
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The apple-tree and pear-tree were chosen and
planted on Jan. 30, 2010 by Boris, Tzippi and Rotem. the other trees -bought by me - I planted 2-3 weeks later, after I lost hope, that Ofir's bricks would be moved from the intended area and the prepared compost |
the
budding of the pear-tree amidst the other new trees, the fig-tree, the passifloras, the vines, the pitangos, on 2010_03_19 |
the
second vine started to bud on April 6, 2010 probably because it hadn't get enough light, squeezed in between Ofir's bricks and the wall towards the street |
finally the apple-tree started to bud, also on April 6, 2010 |
Now, that also the apple-tree, planted by 3 starchildren on Jan. 30, has begun
to bud,
(after the dying of Jonathan Segev's
apple-tree plant at
Ein-Gedi Fieldschool in 1999,
and after the dying of my Arad Starchildrens'
apple-tree plant in "my" garden in 2005)
I am dedicating the rest of this page to documenting my new attempt of growing
trees.
The ugliness, which still prevails because of my
landlord's snail-slow paving part of his estate,
(I believe, that it will be for the best, like the
uprooting of part of the garden for his tractoron)
makes me remember, that planting these trees doesn't promise me permanence
in my "castle".
I am, indeed, free of such expectation and free to enjoy the living of my
trees from day to day.
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It's inconspicable between my passiflora and my neighbor's glorious Amarillis,
but it lives!!!!!
The first of the three apple-trees, which I've planted in my life
following the saying, attributed to Martin Luther 500 years ago:
"What would you do , if you knew, that the World
would go down the drain tomorrow? "
"Then I would plant an apple-tree today!"
I had almost lost hope for this one too.
But then came Jonathan Segev, 5 days ago, who had given me an apple-tree plant
for my 61st birthday.
After we had such a beneficial interaction
in summer 1999 at Ein-Gedi Fieldschool,
which he now came to reconnect to, in order to reconnect to himself...
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I'm also |
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