"Driving Backward into the Future" = "Closeups to the Past" = Healing&Harvesting my Past

Where have I told the story of my driving career?
the riddle of how I made my license four times without having failed once?

The first license on a private car I made during my last year in Germany, 1963.
Once I took Immanuel , my - not very quiet - baby to the theory lessons in class,
since my mother wasn't there to babysit, and my brother was in the same lesson.


When we immigrated to Israel and finally lived together with Immanuel's father,
we had no car for several years, and my license expired.

My husband bought me a "tustus", a motorized bike,
and I made the license for it.
In 1970, after my brother was killed by a car-accident on Febr. 19,
I wanted to again make my license on private cars.
To avoid "discussions" I waited,
until my husband went abroad for several weeks,
and secretly and hurriedly made the license.
A suitor during my scholarship year in Israel, Wim Burgers from Holland,
- came to Israel to see me - by chance a day after I had received the papers.
He wanted to see old Jaffa and I drove him there, with my 3 kids in the car.
I parked it on a steep spot and - forgot to pull the handbreaks!
I could have killed us all - but it wasn't the time for it in our dramas....


When the kids had grown
and I developed the idea of following Abraham's footsteps,
and it became clear in time, that I could do this only in a mobile home,
I registered for making a truck driver license in 1984
"Your pupil is a woman?
"
the other teachers mocked.


I got the license, I bought an old army bus, I got the papers to drive it,
I bought an old jeep, 1985, and later an old Peugeot pickup truck,1993,
I drove mostly on bad desert trails , etc. etc. etc.
and when the time had come for another Lekh-Lekha,
away from my creation "Succah in the Desert",
I let the bus be repaired - begging for money from many friends -
but - alas - did no longer get the licence for the vehicle itself:
'too old!' (1974).
It was June 1996.
How would I drive?


This became my most frightening driving experience:
The good man, who had taken care of repairing my bus,
while I had permission to park outside the Alpacca Farm,
said, he would come with me and bring also his Arab friend,
who was a truck-driver, though his license had been taken away.
My household, veranda equipment, bicycle, everything was packed,
but we waited until an hour before midnight,
hoping that during the night the police would sleep.
The descent from Mitzpe-Ramon into the crater was the worst passage:
How strange, that one of those recent snow-photos (will be told later)
shows just this:
a bus stopping before driving down the windings into the Crater!


My "Angels on the Abyss" were always behind me in their car,
but then - after about 4 hours of driving - they saw the bus deviating for a second.
Frightened - they honked to signal that I should wait for them.
Seeing, that I was utterly exhausted, they suggested,
that the Arab license-deprived truck-driver take over.
I had one hour to sleep on my bed while driven - a wonderful feeling.


I succeeded in slipping through the cracks of the police
during several moves of my mobile home - to and in Eilat.
But then the "producer of my life-drama" had to put an end to it.
"You still have some other exterior lessons to go through,
and once you'll have learnt them, you'll do the work you came for,
and this work can be accomplished only inside of you!"
[put in "Search" of "Godchannel-Navigator" the words "inside of you"!]


When Tamir and I were ready to move to the Dead Sea,
I first drove on a dust-road , parallel to the asphalt road from Eilat.
After some 20 km, something in the motor went wrong.
I had to wait for a man from Eilat who would repair it.
Since it was the Eve of Shavuoth (Pentecoast) I said to Tamir:
"Go to your family! I'll spend the festival alone in the desert".


This is what I did, and I enjoyed it immensely - one more time.
When the bus was repaired, I drove on, but soon had no choice
but joining the asphalt road,
only to be caught by the police after a few minutes.
They accompanied me to the parking lot of Jotwatah,
where I spent the night and searched for somebody to tow the bus away.

We reached Metzuqee-Dragot , and that was the end of my home's mobility.



In the years 2001-2004 at Modi'in
I was often asked by my daughter to fetch her kids from the Democratic School,
or to bring them to the pool at Neve-Shalom in summer.
This is how I got a chance to practise driving
and also to deal with automatic, gear-less, cars,
but imprinted in my body is still the handling of gears.

[I had just finished this verbal sculpture and searched for images,
when my sweet landlord came and brought me a plate with hot food:
a turkey shnitzel, cucumbers, tomatos, a fresh scone!
"In honor of" this treat I decided to skip the noon-pool,
-I've extended the morning-pool, and it's still cold and foggy outside-
and not interrupt the creative momentum until the Eve of Shabbat!]

I walked towards the closest hill,
my heart light and joyous.
Rright behind the back-side of all those buildings
I saw a buzzard hovering in the air - for so long,
that I became sure , it was some man-made device.
But when I came closer, the bird lifted into the air,
and settled on this lamp-post.
I followed the free bird
and I observed the two men,
wishing they would find a job,
which would full-fill them...