| The
Purpose of HEALING - K.I.S.S.
- as stated 12 years ago - was and is
to help me and my potential P E E R s
"to HEAL ourselves into WHOLEness,
and - by extension - all of CREATion!" |
|
I focus my experiencing and awareness on being
"a pioneer of Evolution
in learning to feel":
I let my Body vibrate and my Heart 'womb'
pain, shame, fear, boredom, powerlessness,
so feelings can >heal >guide>fulfill>evolve,
and ~~~ offer ~~~"goldmines"~~~ to us all!!
"I
want you to feel everything, every little thing!"
|
|
K.I.S.S. -
L O G 2
0 0 8
Keep It Simple Sweetheart
| |
1 |
2 |
3 |
4 |
5 |
6 |
7 |
|
|
1
2
3 |
How
Learn
And |
I
The
Train |
Heal
Conditions
In |
Myself
For
Creating |
|
Whole
On
Conditions
|
Self-acceptance
Earth
Daily |
Click!
|
Then those who see Ha-Shem, will talk
among each other,
and he listens and he
hears
yatakaalamuna allathina
yarau'na-hu ,
va-yusri va-yasma'
Dann die IHN schauen, werden reden miteinander,
und er lauscht und er
hoert
Puis ceux qu'ils voient Ha-Shem, se parlent
l'un a l'autre
il entends,
il ecoute
|
It seems that I chose 26 actors
for my life's drama and those 26 actors chose me! One
common trait of all roles is "mutual dependency"
between them and me.
With 16 actors - my family - the mutual
dependency is life-long! With my landlords
at Arad & with my
6 starchildren, born
between 1986-88, it may be temporary.
My children: Immanuel, Ronnit, Micha; my
children-in-love: Efrat, Uri, Ra'ayah; my 10 grandchildren [born
1987-2005): Elah-Alon-Tomer-Mika; Jonathan-Rotem-Yael-Itamar;
Arnon-Ayelet
My landlords: Ofir & Meital+ Lior (2002) & Amit (2005).
My starchildren: Lior Oren, Zipi Winkler , Dina Strat , Meshi
Taib, Gal Mor, Boris Arons [26=YHWH=13+13=ahavah+ahavah =LOVE!]
|
Intro
to
k.i.s.s.-l o g + all
dates
~ Library of
7 years ~ HOME
~ contact ~
SEARCH
( of Latin characters only!) my
eldest granddaughter's video-gallery
|
|
2008
December 19
Kislev
22
Friday
|
|
|
Actions:
Kisslog: healing-creating
TV & Internet: learning
Cleaning my room
Washing dishes
Watering plants
Playing with Mika
Radiating serenity |
Interactions:
with Immanuel, with Mika, with Efrat
Ph. from Hagai
Lev- 1 hr. !!!!!
later:
SMS><
from him.
e-mail from and to Margret Daehndl!!!
e-mail from and to Lior Oren |
|
The FOCUS of MY INTENTION
TODAY
Know exactly what you want, communicate clearly what you want,
then get out of the way, live and play, and let happen what
may
11:38
I desire that my very presence will
heal tensions without my worried mind interfering
with words
I desire that Hagai
Lev's heart will apply to his living, what
his mind is learning each night for 3 hrs
I desire to finally meet my "appointed PEERS", and
create a "havruta" of mutual dependency
with the one goal to continuously, consistently help each other
& through each other to HEAL,
and manifest a model of Heaven-on-Earth by the way each one
lives &feels zest-full & full-filled.
13:27
Efrat finally brought the "AZ
NIDBERU"
quilt back from repair, does this herald my peers? |
|
|
hodayot [thanksgivings] for
today
9:30
My Body,
my Partner,
my God
I give thanks to you for letting me re-discover and reinforce
the SKILL
to apply a Paula-Aya key in 'unpleasant', 'boring' or 'pressuring'
moments,
be it in the train, when it stops "nowhere" and
might not reach Lod in time,
or be it in situations & interactions which I either chose
or "find myself in",
but which are not intense enough to make me feel "zest-full
and full-filled".
Even if I fear to be observed, I can apply keys without being
noticed:
contracting the anus & bladder sphincters, spreading toes,
lifting a knee,
and mainly & always: focusing on 'that point between our
shoulder-blades'.
I'm grate-full for a little "righteousness-test",
which I failed, but which healed:
Efrat was laughing - again - about my singing "too high
like an opera-singer", telling Immanuel that and how
Mika had said: "I can't understand
her".
I began to justify myself:
"You were up there combing Mika's
hair, while I was at the piano"
[still figuring out the chords for
Mika's song & not focusing on singing the lyrics clearly].
I couldn't say the words in brackets, since Efrat interrupted
me, saying lightly: "One cannot
tell you anything",
meaning: even a joke about you triggers you.
It was then that I caught myself as being engaged in "wanting
to be righteous".
And instead of going on justifying myself, I vibrated
my need to be appreciated for the way I sing, especially while
practicing a song I made for Mika.
This also gave me a chance to heal an old pain, for it was
not a joke, but scorn, which I "staged" with Michal,
the first Succah volunteer: "You sing like a...!"
|
In the midst of sculpting today's altar I received
a phone-call from ... Hagai Lev (lev=heart)
We haven't talked - perhaps since February
25, where I find this entry:
"I wouldn't quote these well-phrased,
but all-too-general
and - for me - almost banale sentences
from Jean Hudon's "Meditation-Focus",
if I hadn't - just half an hour before - closed yesterday's
log
with my tiredness of listening to "make-wrong of ego".
May Jean Hudon's summary express,
[see the right frame of this entry on Febr. 25, - I've no
patience to re-read it now]
what Yossi Rudoy and Hagai Lev's Rabbi mean.
I may have distorted what they believe in,
and I'm definitely not judging them as persons,
i.e. rays of the one sun, waves of the one ocean, colors of
the one light.
But neither must I deny,
that the theoretical phrasing of that truth is - for me -
nothing but vishi-vashi and bla-bla-bla,
as long as those people do not share with me,
how they apply this knowing
to every moment of their breathing-in and breathing-out."
|
Imagining that both our efforts to somehow communicate on the same wave-length
would take time,
I put on my sandals, took my camera and walked out into what Bet Nehemya
can provide as "Nature".
It is impossible to enjoy a pretty, pure
view from Bet Nehemya.
But there might be a sign.... in this broken-down part.... of the
security fence.... around the village,
that it will not take too long, until I'll "find
myself on an almost virgin earth"....
Amidst all the junk, the dreariness,
dryness and uglyness
I discern this glorious anemone, the first I see in this winter.
|
A spot in the middle of an ugly track
with pretty white flowers,
the name of which I once knew... |
Haggai studies Kabbala every night from 3-6
A.M. , seven days a week,
has moved his living-space next to the meeting place and does odd jobs
to keep his head above the water, "hanging above a cliff",
as he expressed it.
I didn't get a chance to hear more than these dry words about his circumstances,
nor about how his intense - and obviously fulfilling mind-studies -
influence his life.
But I insisted on working with him on phrasing his desire - "what
do you want?"
I'll quote the final version of his longing,
so as to give it more energy:
"I, Hagai, desire to know the real source
of Love,
so that the love I want to give and the love I want to receive,
will be REAL love".
"Real" for him means: "permanent,
forever".
The battery of my cellphone signalled that
it soon would be empty.
When the phone stopped the interaction, it was exactly the right moment..
And this is what I saw from across the junction to which I had returned
by then:
My son coming back from Shoham with bags and bags of food...
 |
|
Then came an even greater surprise : another
friend-of-old addressed me, this time by e-mail.
"Sabera Margret Dähndel sent you a message on Facebook"
Sabera??? - but Margret, - yes, - I know her well,
At the beginning of 2008, she and
the 3 children, who owe their names to me, slept with me in my one
room at Arad.
We also spent a day together at the
Dead Sea.
Since then I hadn't heard from her.
Now she shares with me, that she is conducting workshops in Sinai,
thanks me for all she has learnt from me
during 22 years,
and asks me, if I may guide her concerning her self-chosen assignment:
7 days of wandering in the desert (with the help of camels and their
Bedouin guide Hamdan),
a learning situation for at least 8 female participants, which seems
to have some aspects in common with my 3 attempts
of teaching people in and through the Desert:
"Adam ba-Midbar" (see
"My
Ordeal", a link which I recently mentioned to Lior Oren,
"I've read the red pages",
she told me. "Have
you? I myself am not able to re-read them,
though I accept my "failures" as "right"
for me , it still pains to read sculptures like those.")
I found the page "Training
Space" , made a few graphic
corrections and added:
I got an e-mail from Margret Daehndl,
once my pupil and friend:
she now intends to lead women
into and in the Sinai Desert
for similar purposes as described
in my - never realized - programs
of Training Emotions, and of Training Dreamers
[In addition to the brochures
inserted on the page "Training Space",
see also the plans for the RedSeaPartnerSHIP-Raft,1997-98
and "Training
Dreamers at the Dead Sea, in 2004...)
But these are only examples - even
for "Rakhaf" I envisioned a "Training Space",
but the dreaming and planning and advertising was cut off on that
day, on which my sister died, Nov.
6, 2004.
My last project in the exterior world - The
Cave of the Womb -
was meant only as a model for Bedouin Hosting Economy,
which - in content - would have been based on "Spaces for Healing
and Learning".
But I no longer saw myself as a trainer in those spaces.
Margret now has a website: http://www.meditation-walk.com/sabera.html
On the page "Wie alles begann", how
everything began, I discover an image
of Margret's firstborn, whom I gave the name "Gavriel",
on the background of "the Hill of the Angels' Flight" which
towers over "Succah in the Desert"
as well "The
Mount Lekh-Lekha " across the path to Mitzpe-Ramon.
 |
"All this was seeded 20 years ago
in the deserts of Israel
and in the work with my teacher and friend
Dr. Christa-Rachel Bat-Adam and her
project ......
For a short time there was such a desert-project also in Sinai..... |
|
 |
 |
 |
 |
 |
Liebe
Rachel, nun ist es fast ein Jahr her seit wir bei dir waren.
Es waren so schöne Stunden
und vieles hat weiter in mir gearbeitet
und ein Ergebnis ist die Arbeit im Sinai.
Schau doch mal unter www.meditation-walk.com
Morgen fliege ich nach Cairo und
fahre weiter nach Nuweiba
und vom 25.dez.-01.jan. werde ich den ersten meditation-walk
durchführen.
Rachel ich bin dir aus ganzem Herzen dankbar
für alles was ich je von und mit dir lernen durfte.
Ich habe mich immer ein Stück mehr beseelt gefühlt.
Und meine Seel ist ja auch eine Wüstenseele.
Was aus dem Samen im Sinai wird weiß
ich nicht
- aber ich weiß, daß ich dich gerne als Freundin,Lehrerin,Supervisorin
als Begleitung und Gegenüber hätte,
um mir dieser Arbeit bewußter zu werden.
Ich empfinde sie als essenziell.
Und doch tappe ich wie ein Blinder im Nebel.
Frage: Hast du Lust und Zeit mit mir zu arbeiten?
Ich würde dich gerne besuchen,
am liebsten bevor meine Tour am 25.dez. los geht.
In Nuweiba ist ein Internetcafe,
da kann ich mit dir schreiben bzw. dich von dort anrufen.
Ich würde mich über eine Antwort riesig freuen.
Fühl dich ganz herzlich umarmt, Margret
Ps: ganz liebe Grüße von Gavriel,
Tamar und Jotam
|
Liebe
Margret, (was bedeutet Sabera?)
Da du morgen schon fliegst, muss ich mich ja beeilen,
obwohl ich gern etwas Zeit gehabt haette,
um Deinen Brief und Deine Bitte zu verdauen.
Gluecklicherweise konnte ich es mir leisten
(ich bin in Bet Nehemya bei Shoham,
wo meine Kinder jetzt wohnen,
weil morgen Mika's dritter Geburtstag gefeiert wird,
und nicht nur morgen am Shabbat keine Verkehrsmoeglichkeit besteht,
sondern auch heute, ausnahmsweise, im ganzen Land keine Zuege
fahren.)
3 Stunden lang Deine sehr gute, beneidenswert
einfache website zu geniessen,
alle Texte und Bilder zu kopieren (trotz des Verbotes Deines "Impressums!")
und daraus eine Komposition fuer meine heutige Tagebuch-Seite
zu machen.
Danach habe ich lange nach innen gehoert, ob es richtig waere,
Dir als "Lehrerin, Supervisorin, als Begleitung und Gegenueber"
zu dienen,
und auch ob dies technisch in der Chanuka-Woche ueberhaupt moeglich
ist.
Lass mich mit der letzten Zeile beginnen:
Nur am Sonntag waere ich frei, zwischen 9.00 und 17:00, in Bet
Nehemya..
Am Montag beginnen mittags die Ferien von
Mika.
Mittwoch frueh kommt Immanuel, der Sonntagabend fliegt, zurueck,
und ich fahre nach Arad, aber nicht allein, sondern mit meiner
Enkelin Rotem (15).
Natuerlich koennte ich 2 Stunden mit Dir "arbeiten",
aber waere die Reise sinnvoll?
Darin liegt auch die tiefere Antwort, Margret! Sie lautet: Es
waere NICHT richtig!
Ich bin nur fuer die 26 Menschen da, darunter fuer die 16 Seelen
meiner Familie,
mit denen mich eine k o n t i n u i e r l i c h e
gegenseitige Abhaengigkeit verbindet.
Punktuelle "Arbeit" ist Verschwendung von Zeit, Energie,
Motivation und Liebe.
Ich vertraue aber, dass Du, wenn "die Zeit richtig ist",
tiefe Er-fuellung er-leben wirst!
Sei getrost! ----- Deine Christa-Rachel
|
|
Finetuning
to my Present
My response to Margret's quest is a master-piece
of purity and clarity:
purity from all the pains which came up when touching (only
touching)
some (only some) of the programs, brochures, sites about my
own dream
to lead people into the Desert
and train them how to live zest-fully & full-filled.
"Clarity", because I could say a loving, but clear
"No! It would NOT be right
to adopt the role of guiding you ".
But I wonder about the synchronicity of the messages from 2
former pupils.
And also how - the more I remember "old" programs
of Desert-Trainings -
the more "papers" turn up in my memory, even if they
no longer exist.
And my Big Brother fantasy - not a "dream", for I
do not want that prison!
nor do I want the pressure, that something is expected from
me, any longer -
whispers:
"these coincidences are meant to prepare you for your real
assignment:
training dreamers in a desert like environment
(desert in its difficult aspects..)
and in front of the entire world".
And now, since the Eve of Shabbat has begun, I put all this
in YOUR HANDS...
|
Lior Oren asked me to send her feedback to her
application for a voluntary job in Africa-Ruanda
Preparing the dough for the birthday cake, and
later: ornamenting the cake
As to more
images of both cake creating activities see on December
30
|
Correction of first line:
My name is Lior Oren, I am
20 years old
and a neighbor of Daniella Ott at Alon.
|
|
Song
of the Day
How simple and moving old love-folks-songs
are!
How different is everything today ...
While re-learning what we sang so often in my youth and as students,
I decided to focus on three stanzas only
and to convert the last line from "you have forgotten how
heart lay by heart"
into "I'll never forget how heart lay by heart"
1.
Adé zur guten Nacht!
Jetzt wird der Schluß gemacht,
Daß ich muß scheiden.
|: Im Sommer da wächst der Klee,
Im Winter, da schneit's den Schnee,
Da komm ich wieder. :|
|
2.
Es trauern Berg und Tal,
Wo ich viel tausendmal
Bin drüber gangen;
|: Das hat deine Schönheit gemacht,
Hat mich zum Lieben gebracht
Mit großem Verlangen. :| |
3.
Das Brünnlein rinnt und rauscht
Wohl dort am Holderstrauch,
Wo wir gesessen,
|: Wie manchen Glockenschlag,
Da Herz bei Herzen lag,
ich werd's nie vergessen. :|
|
|
|
2008
December 19
Kislev
22
Friday
|
|
|
Actions:
Kisslog: healing-creating
TV & Internet: learning
Cleaning my room
Washing dishes
Watering plants
Playing with Mika
Radiating serenity |
Interactions:
with Immanuel, with Mika, with Efrat
Ph. from Hagai
Lev- 1 hr. !!!!!
later:
SMS><
from him.
e-mail from and to Margret Daehndl!!!
e-mail from and to Lior Oren |
|
Intro
to
k.i.s.s.-l o g + all
dates
~ Library of
7 years ~ HOME
~ contact ~
SEARCH
( of Latin characters only!) my
eldest granddaughter's video-gallery
whole&full-filled,
never perfect&complete 
Keep It
Simple Sweetheart
K.I.S.S.
- L O G 2
0 0 8
|
