The Purpose  of   HEALING - K.I.S.S. - as stated 12 years ago - was and is   to help me and my potential P E E R s  "to HEAL ourselves into WHOLEness, and - by extension - all of CREATion!"

Intro to Healing-K.i.s.s. 2001-2013 and Overview of its main libraries [If you look for a word on this page, click ctrl/F and put a word in "find"]

I focus my experiencing and awareness on being "a   pioneer of  Evolution  in  learning  to  feel": I let my Body vibrate and my Heart 'womb' pain, shame, fear, boredom, powerlessness, so feelings can >heal >guide>fulfill>evolve, and ~~~ offer ~~~"goldmines"~~~ to us all!! "I want you to feel everything, every little thing!"

image of the day

My quiet Khaelmonit Street ~~with the quiet house of the Cohen Family, in which I live

hodayot [thanksgivings] for today

7:45
My Body, my Partner,
I give thanks to our ears,
for enabling us to communicate with people,
and to enjoy the twitter of the Tristram-starlings,
and to delight in all the sounding creation.

My ears give thanks to the people in my house and neighborhood,
to Ofir&Meital, my landlords, and their kids Lior and Amit,
to Nizza&Shalom, to Albert&Zacha, to Shulamit&Abraham,
who guard such peace and quiet,
as contrasted by sudden "music" with a heavy beat yesterday evening
and 10 min. of a car's alarm that went off by error at 6:30 this morning.
Not even dogs are barking.
The neighborhood is called "Shaqed" (almond),
but it it could also be called "Shaqet" (quiet).

"I was attracted by your name "Christa-Rachel", can there be such a name in Israel?
My Jewish mother called me "Tina", short for "Christina",
and my middle name is "Rachel", pronounced the Yiddish way 'Ruchl'!

"But how come, you found me in the first place?"

"Oh, you just search for Skype-Users in Israel, and you get all the profiles!"

"But I've deleted my profile years ago, not wanting anybody to call me!"

"Really? Well, God who created the world with one word, can do anything."

"What about God-Channel?" I was eager to come to "my" point.

Disappointment: Tina listens to a radio or TV channel from Jerusalem,
broadcasted all over the planet, an "evangelic" channel, which promotes "God's Word".

Tina, a Jew who became a "believer", i.e. Christian, was also disappointed, I think,
since I told her, that I walked the opposite path, from being a Christian to becoming a Jew.

This is how Felicia attracted me into her life:
In Sept. 1973, a few weeks before the YomKippur War, I started a job.
Nothing in my life was like in other people's life ,
and the statement "I started a job",
will not arouse the proper connotations.
So I must "drive backward" even further.
Which reminds me of a sentence of "God" which I re-read 2 days ago:
"I am no longer wishing to run things in Creation,
or have it any way other than the way you desire it to be.
...
And I am no longer planning anything for you
or anyone else in Creation.
I'm driving backward now,
...
and re-experiencing
all of the pain and anguish
I've caused"

The first money I earned, when I was 6 years old,
plucking peas on a field together with many people.
At the age of 9 I earned an egg for knitting, as I told,
but for a sweater I knitted at the age of 12 I got money!
It was no joy, though, it was more of a sword in my heart.
My mother had knitted a sweater for the same woman,
but the design was so complicated and difficult,
that my mother suffered all the way through knitting,
and then that woman said to me, luckily not to my mother:
"I like your sweater much better than your mother's!"

At the age of 13 I started to give private lessons,
and during the last 4 years of school
I "spent" my afternoons walking to pupils
and teaching them Latin or Greek or both.
By that time I also was good enough in playing the organ,
and I often was called to replace the regular cantor
in Sunday services.

In 1957 I worked in a summer-camp for a little money,
stories, stories, stories
and when I switched my studies to theology,
where 6 months of practical work were demanded,
I worked as a volunteer for almost no money
in a hospital
["you are not suited to be a nurse", I was screamed at ,
because I held the hand of a man who was dying....]
and in Bethel, the town for those sick with epilepsy.
stories, stories, stories...

The only "real" job was selling the first "non-ironing" blouses
at the first huge department store in Stuttgart, my home-town.
How come?

One of the harsh predicaments of my childhood and youth was:
no proper flat to live in!
One day there came an outrageous proposal :
to join a "social building project" of the Church.
Since we had not one penny to even begin with,
I did something outrageous as well - secretly.
I wrote a long letter to the chef of "Brenninkmeyer &Co" in Hamburg:
"I heard that you gave so many millions for the rebuilding
of the St. Leonhard's Church,
couldn't you give some money to our distressed family?"
Miraculously the big boss answered,
"you shouldn't write such long letters, nobody will read them."
As to my quest he proposed that I work as a saleswoman in his store,
for the salary of an oldtimer,
and he also commanded the Church
to transfer a small amount of his contribution.
That's how I came to sell and to lie.
"Is it really true, that theses blouses don't need any ironing?"
"Yes, yes, it's true!" I said, though it wasn't.
This way I sold 90 blouses one Saturday-morning.

Since I didn't want to miss my studies,
I only worked during the "Semester-holidays",
March-April and August-September-October.


Then I was a mother and house-wife in Israel.
I edited the books of my dead father-in-law,
I learnt Hebrew, and after a year Arabic,
I worked on my Ph.D. thesis for 5 years,
and all the time agreed with my husband,
that I shouldn't start work outside the house,
until the youngest would be ten years old.

But after I had delivered the final version of my thesis,
DEPRESSION - always a horrid guest of mine - settled in!
I was warned, that this was a common phenomenon
after the completion of a superhuman achievement.
So I was careful to grant myself just one free day,
and immediately started with - what I called -
preparing for my vocation.

What this vocation was, and maybe still is,
cannot be told today.
It has to do with "Work and World":
"If human beings learn to do the work which makes them feel full-filled,
the tasks of the world will find the people which will accomplish them."

I learnt, I studied, I did research, I ...
a terrible story of frustration and simply wanting to die.
"When Micha will be 14 , I can leave, but not before that",
and there was this comforting parable:
A man came to a village, wanting to be hosted for the night.
Only a very poor couple received him in their hole.
He gave them a ring:
"If you rub this ring and utter a wish, the wish will be fulfilled!
But only one wish! If you waste it, there will be no other."
The couple felt tempted to wish for a hut to live in.
"No", they said to each other, "we can achieve that with our own hands!"
And they said this, whenever they were tempted to use the ring.
"One day we'll need something, which we cannot do ourselves,
then the ring will serve us."
Once the ring was secretly exchanged by some greedy man,
who wished for a lot of money, got burried underneath and died.
The couple was not aware of having an ordinary ring on their finger.
They built a happy life, and died in good age, both on the same day,
taking the ring into their grave.

Even now I have tears in my eyes:
for me the ring was the wish to die.

Much later I understood, that death was an illusion,
and that "not existing" was the only thing impossible.
How mad at "God" have I been because of that !
But that was later.

At that time I still believed that dying was possible,
and I envied all the soldiers who fell in Vietnam.

Then came some rescue.
The director of an institute for vocational counseling said to me:
"Stop learning and studying and researching!
Start doing a job, something that is connected to your purpose."

How could I find such a job?
And how on earth would my husband allow me to go out for work?

I don't know, if I even dared to tell him,
that I envied every young bank-employee etc.
"At least she brings some money home!"

Oh those tears that well up now,
and all because I wanted to tell about my talk with Felicia....

But somebody really had pity with me.
After a few days a letter! from the librarist of that institute
to whom I had talked while waiting for the director.
"I saw an ad in the newspaper, see, if this is for you."
The Ministry of Labor looked for "Placement Officers",
who would work with "Academic Immigrants to find jobs".
From among fifty candiates only four were chosen,
and I was the only one who finished ten months.
Probably because the other three suffered the same frustration:
there simply were no jobs for these immigrants,
and communicating with them without knowing Russian was difficult.

Micha was only six years old,
this was the first time, but not the last,
that I parted from my youngest too soon.
But I knew, that if I wanted to stay alive at all,
leave alone until he would be fourteen years old,
I needed to take care of what little self-esteem a job could give me.

"My" academic immigrants were gathered in a "Center" for 5 months,
The first group of 120 people at Kfar Yona near Natanya, in caravans
the second group in Natanya itself, but in a proper building.

Felicia and her husband met me at Kfar Yona.
Unlike most immigrants who came from Russia ,
they came from Rumania.
Felicia's husband was a water-engineer.
I remember exactly that I turned to 27 places of employment
for him,
but nobody would accept him.

Felicia was a teacher in Rumania,
she endeavored to find a solution for herself, and found one ~~~~~~~ for me! [Go on in left frame]


The only image of Yitzchak Peri, is the one on the cover of my book.
There he is surrounded by 5 of my pupils - from 5 different countries.
To the right: Esther, with whom I traveled to Egypt in 1982,
see Nourishment>July 12, 2011

Excerpts from an article about Yitchak Peri:
published 2000 in the journal of the Israel Teacher's Union.

We haven't seen each other for at least a year and a half.
We haven't talked since his 37th birthday on November 23, 2007.
So the message came totally out of the blue.
I called him- even a bit worried: "Is something the matter?"
"No! I simply felt such a longing for you,
that I felt pushed to send you this message."
He was waiting at some road to hitchhike to his course , third year,
about "Healing and Judaism".
"I so much want to see you, when will it finally happen?"
I laughed!
He knows that I won't come to Neve-Eitan, to the Lake of Tiberias.
I hadn't even been to the wedding of Yuval-David and Paz,
at "Noah's Shore" at the Salt Sea, December 2006.
He also knows, like I do,
that if an encounter doesn't "happen",
something in him or me is postponing it,
and that is alright,
"we are always tied together", I comforted him.
"I know".
Still, I told him that I would be at Shoham next week,
and he promised himself to try and visit me there.

Most of the time only I slept in the tent, but here it is Tamir,
covered with Efrat's blanket, supported by my cushions

Spring flowers in Nizza's and Shalom's garden
(those neighbors who don't fence themselves in....)